Trust
by Dragid
Summary: After the defeat of Homura, our favorite group is back on the road and heading west towards Kougaji's stronghold. Romance blossoms and awkward fun soon follows! GojyoxHakkai SanzoxGoku
1. Friend

A/N: Not much to say here, just another Sanzo/Goku and Hakkai/Gojyo fic. Have fun and please review, remember, us writers thrive off of praise (and _constructive_ criticism.)

Disclaimer: ­I do not own Saiyuki….I wish I did though ::sigh::

**Trust**

**Chapter 1: Friend**

The Sanzo-Ikkou was built off of trust and similarities of the past. The four men were all those who had seen death and felt pain, they all had had hard lives. Son Goku: the monkey king who had rampaged the heavens after the death of Konzen Douji. Cho Hakkai: The human turned youkai whose sister and lover had killed herself because a demon raped and impregnated her. Sha Gojyo: The half-breed whose mother and brother had been lovers and had his mother try to kill him, his brother killing his mother during the attempt. Genjyo Sanzo: The not-so-Buddhist high priest whose mentor and father had sacrificed himself so that Sanzo could live.

The four, although they did not always get along, were closer than they or anyone else could guess. United to stop the resurrection of Gyumaoh and save the land, they traveled together and worked together to fight the legions of youkai sent by Kougaji, and now Homura also.

At the moment, the four were accelerating down a road in the desert…

"Sanzooooooo, I'm hungry….." whined Goku, "Can you please let me have one of those pork buns Hakkai bought back in town?"

Sanzo turned to glare at the monkey king, "What do you think, you dumbass monkey, now shut up!" he yelled, then exposed the ever present fan and proceeded to beat Goku.

"Ow! Stop! Hey! Ow! Stupid monk, cut it out! OW!" Goku yelled.

"You. Stupid. Chimp! Shut. Up. I. Was. Trying. To. Sleep. You. Stupid. DUMBASS!" Sanzo yelled at Goku.

Hakkai kept driving, "Ano…why don't you stop beating Goku, Sanzo. It makes for a much quieter trip."

Gojyo sipped a beer, "Nah, the stupid chimp deserves it, let Sanzo beat the damned monkey."

Goku stopped yelling at Sanzo, and instead turned to the water-spite, "What do you mean, 'Let him keep hitting me!' You're just an ero kappa!"

"What?!" Yelled Gojyo.

"You heard me, ero kappa." Goku retorted.

"Why you…" Gojyo growled.

"Yeah, bring it on you stupid sprite, you can't even swim!"

"Stupid monkey!"

"Ero kappa!"

"Chibi chimp!"

"Cockroach!"

"Dumbass!"

"ENOUGH!" Sanzo yelled, interrupting the onslaught of name calling. "Unless," the monk paused, "You really want to die," he added, cocking his gun.

"NO!" Goku and Gojyo yelled in unison, scrambling as far away from the pissed of monk as humanly (or in their case, demonly) possible.

"Good. Now shut up or your ass is hauling itself to Shangri-La." Sanzo told them before settling down in his seat and going to sleep.

Gojyo looked at Sanzo for a moment, "If he's a monk, shouldn't he be meditating or something monk-ish?" He saw Sanzo twitch angrily, "Then again, they also need sleep." he said quickly.

From the driver's seat Hakkai smiled, this journey was never boring, that was for sure.

**Another hundred miles and two hours of silence later… **

Hakkai pulled in smoothly in front of a local inn at 11 pm sharp. "We're here." he announced quietly, so as not to disturb sleeping villagers.

"FOOD!" Goku yelled, completely shattering Hakkai's attempts.

"Shut up." Sanzo said just as loud, also leaving the echo of a thwack echoing through the town.

Hakkai smiled and sighed, none of them would ever learn, so before Gojyo and Goku started up again, he dragged them into the in.

Sanzo stalked over to the desk and slapped his credit card on the desk in front of the clerk, "Four rooms. Now." he growled.

"Please!" Hakkai added from his position between the fighting monkey and sprite.

The girl sweat dropped, "Umm…I'm sorry, but we only have two rooms available right now, I'm afraid that a large group of people have taken most of our lodging for the night."

Sanzo glared, "Fine, two rooms it is."

The girl smiled in spite of the monk's death glare, "Two rooms it is." She placed to keys on the table and Sanzo grabbed one.

Before anyone could register what had happened, Hakkai had grabbed the other one and stood there with a smile, "Thank you, miss." he said.

The girl grinned nervously, these guys were weirdos, "Um, I'll show you to your rooms now." she said and led them to the third room at the end of the hall. "These are it." she said before hurrying back downstairs.

"Wait…" Gojyo called before following Hakkai into his room, "Oh well." he muttered, then turned to Sanzo, "Oh yeah, you got the monkey tonight."

Sanzo, who was already tired with a headache, turned to Goku, "Make any noise and I'll kill you."

Goku nodded, "Okay, Sanzo." he said and crawled into his bed without any sound.

Sanzo sighed and went to sit on the window, just as it began to rain. "Great," he muttered, "Rain. Just what I needed tonight."

He continued to stare at the falling drops and remembered the blood, the screams, the pain n he had felt. Had Komyou known what was going to happen to him? That night as he made Kouryuu the river rat the respected Genjyo Sanzo there had been something in his eyes, something sad and knowing. Had he known that that night had to be the one, or else the temple elders would have chosen someone more…devout to be the new Sanzo priest.

He was shaken out of his memories by a low moan from Goku's bed, "Shut up, monkey."

Goku did not shut up, but began to sweat and thrash around in his bed. He kept moaning and began to cry a bit, "Konzen!" he yelled, "Konzen…please, Konzen! Please…don't die…" his words gave way to tears.

Sanzo looked at the boy with a rare look of affection, "Goku?" He asked.

"Konzen!" Goku screamed.

Sanzo went over to Goku, "It's ok, Goku, don't worry." he said softly, holding the 18 year old close to his body. 'Who the hell is Konzen?' he asked himself, 'And why does that name sound familiar?'

Goku, now comforted by Sanzo's warmth, began to calm down and snuggled into the monk's chest, "Sanzo…" he murmured peacefully.

Sanzo gave the now quiet Goku a smile, "Stupid monkey…" he muttered, "Making me get up."

The monk tried to return to his bed, but the moment he released himself from Goku's grasp, he began to cry again, as if only Sanzo could banish his nightmares. Sanzo sighed and returned to his charge, "Fine, I'll sleep in your bed tonight."

Sanzo quickly stripped down to his jeans and climbed into bed next to Goku, wrapping the boy in his arms. Goku pressed himself into Sanzo's slightly reluctant embrace and smiled in his sleep. He clutched some of the sheets in his hand and pulled it up over himself, "Thank you…Sanzo…" he murmured.

Sanzo watched his charge quickly fall back into a peaceful sleep and slowly he too succumbed to the spell that was sleep.

**Meanwhile…**

Goyjo closed the door to the room he and Hakkai were to share that night and collapsed onto his bed so that he was facing the window, "Shit, it's raining." He said to the other youkai.

Hakkai stared out the window, "Ano…Gojyo…care to chat tonight?" he asked softly.

Goyjo continued to look out the window, "Yeah, I sure as hell wont be sleeping tonight, and knowing the other two, they wont be either."

"Hai…" Hakkai said.

Gojyo continued to watch the falling water droplets, not paying attention to the surrounding world, for the next ten minutes or sp before speaking, "Hakkai-" he was cut off by Goku screaming and yelling in the other room.

Hakkai spoke, "He gets like this when it rains, it's always been me who he's roomed with when this has happened. I've had to sit by his bed so many times so he can sleep. Even then he still moans and thrashes about." the rain fell even faster.

Goyjo once more fell silent before working up the nerve to say what he was going to ask about before, "Hakkai?" he asked.

"Hai, Gojyo?" the demon asked.

"Have…Have you ever thought about Kanan's child…?" his voice trailed off.

Hakkai looked up at Gojyo, startled by the question, "…No." he said softly, "It…would have been like you, Gojyo."

"Exactly." Gojyo confirmed, "A dirty half-breed." he turned away from the demon so that his face was hidden, "Hakkai…If that child had been born, what would you have done?"

Hakkai looked at the half-breed strangely, "What do you mean? I would have cared for it as if it were my own." he said.

"Are- Are you sure about that? Hakkai…my mother beat me, I've told you before. You know why she did too, it was because I'm a half-breed, a child of taboo. You never know what you might have done. My mother saw traces of a woman she never met in me…and traces of the man she loved too. If not for my brother, I would be dead now."

Hakkai turned away from Gojyo to look out the window, his face troubled, "Now that you bring it up, Gojyo, I don't know…I consider you to be my best friend, but if not for…Kanan killing herself…then…I don't think I would have met you."

"Who knows…" Gojyo said, "But, I think that somehow the monk, the monkey, you, and me are somehow linked to always be friends, now matter how much we seem to annoy or dislike each other. I mean, the mini monkey _is_ annoying, but he's like a little brother, and Sanzo…well, maybe not him." Hakkai chuckled at that. Gojyo continued, "And you. You're my best friend in the entire world."

Hakkai smiled at that, "Yes, and you are mine."

Gojyo turned back toward the older man, showing his tearstained face, "Gojyo? Are you alright?" Hakkai asked worriedly.

"Yeah, I'll be fine." Gojyo told him.

They both turned toward the window again, but they found a clear sky with no rain. "Looks like the rain finally stopped." Hakkai observed.

"Yeah, good thing too, I need sleep." Gojyo said.

"We all do, my friend, who knows what awaits us tomorrow." Hakkai smiled, but inside he was still pondering his earlier conversation with his friend. But now that the rain had stopped he was able to push his worrisome thoughts back in his mind.

Gojyo lay down, 'Yeah," he said, "And the past is a painful thing to remember…especially with the rain." he added in a barely audible whisper.

Hakkai lay down in his bed and nodded ever so slightly to agree with the kappa. "Goodnight, Gojyo."

"G'night, Hakkai." Gojyo mumbled.

The two men then slowly fell asleep, just as the rain began to fall again.

Gojyo yawned and sat up in bed. 'What time is it?' he thought groggily, also noticing it was still dark. There was no knock at the door, a sign that it was still maybe four or five hours before sunrise. He then heard a pained moan from his friend.

He looked at Hakkai in horror, the man was dripping sweat and was sobbing in his sleep. "No…Kanan…no…please no…NO, KANAN!" He screamed.

Gojyo sprang out of bed and went to Hakkai's bedside. As he sat next to the man, he noted that it was pouring outside. 'Oh God,' he thought, 'Poor Hakkai, he'll leap out of bed if there's trouble, but if not he's gone until morning…although, a storm this bad, I'm surprised he isn't awake.'

Gojyo's thoughts raced, 'What did Hakkai said he did with Goku when the little brat pulled shit like this. Oh yeah, he sat by his bed and held his hands for comfort!' The kappa flung Hakkai's blanket back and grabbed the man's hand.

Hakkai, as if sensing that Gojyo was a friend, grasped his hand, "It's ok, Hakkai," Gojyo said in what he hoped was a soothing voice, "It's alright, you're just in a dream."

Unfortunately, Hakkai began to get worse, "Oh Gods, Gojyo! No…Not again…don't, my friend…I don't care…NO, NOT YOU GOJYO!" He screamed, "KANAN, GOJYO, NO!" Hakkai sat straight up in bed, his breathing labored and his eyes flew open. In a mad panic he looked at the man next to him and pulled him into a hug, "Oh Gods, I thought you were gone, Gojyo, I thought you had died. Please stay here tonight, please."

Gojyo looked at his poor friend, "Of course I will, now move over." he said.

Hakkai obliged and Gojyo climbed in next to him. Noting that Hakkai was shivering, he pulled the older man to his chest. Hakkai's eyes widened, "Gojyo…?" he questioned.

"Look at yourself," Gojyo answered, "You're a shivering mass of nerves, you need human warmth and comfort."

Hakkai nodded and relaxed against Gojyo, 'This isn't so bad,' he thought, 'it's kind of nice actually, I'd forgotten how warm another person could be.' He yawned and fell asleep.

Gojyo watched Hakkai's breathing even out again and put his chin in the man's chocolaty brown hair. There was something about his friend right now that was different from all of the girls he had held like this. Hakkai seemed to give off a special warmth, it didn't help that every time he moved, he seemed to send a ripple of warmth through Gojyo's body. 'Is this love?' Gojyo thought before sleep claimed his consciousness.

Goku woke to rays of sun filtering though the window and into the room. 'Sun…?' Goku thought, 'We always leave before sunrise.' He then noticed that he was wrapped into the arms of someone else and pressed up against the unknown person's chest. He inhaled and his golden eyes widened, this person was Sanzo!

Slowly, so as not to wake the man up, Goku turned so that he was looking directly at his sun. A quiet gasp escaped the monkey king's lips, Sanzo was…beautiful. Goku had never seen Sanzo completely asleep before, like this. He looked so innocent and kind, his golden hair forming a halo around his face, his pale complexion practically glowing in the early morning light.

In this position, Goku began to notice things about his savior's face that he had never seen before. For one thing, Sanzo had very delicate looking features, with his high cheekbones and full lips, he really could be mistaken for a woman. Goku focused on his hair. It was long for a priest and it seemed to glow like the sun. Goku wondered if it was as soft as it looked.

He lifted his hand from it's spot on Sanzo's bare chest and tentatively stroked the golden locks. They really were that soft! It felt almost like silk to Goku's callused hands. "Beautiful." he whispered.

Sanzo stirred a bit and Goku hurriedly retracted his hand, returning to the man's chest. Hoping to convince Sanzo he was still sleeping, he tucked his head into the monk's chest and evened out his breathing.

The golden haired priest's eyes fluttered open and he yawned, Gods, he hadn't slept that soundly or that well in ages. It was then that he saw the tousled brown hair sticking out of his chest. 'Goku?!' he thought in surprise, his muscles tensing. Then, he relaxed, the saru had been unable to sleep last night so Sanzo had slept with him, comforting the boy the entire night.

Goku moved a little and Sanzo suddenly because acutely aware of how robe-less and shirtless he was, along with just how warm and shirtless Goku was. He felt one of the walls of his heart crack. Sanzo felt it, he knew it, Goku had the power to break his barriers, he had been doing so since Sanzo had rescued him from his mountain prison. His walls were going to begin to collapse soon, he knew it…and he didn't want them too.

So, with a brief mental apology to Goku, he sat up, "Time to get up, Saru." Sanzo said briskly, his eyes now fully registering the sunlight. "Ugh, we slept to late. I wanted to get out of here early. Breakfast to go today, Goku." he said sharply.

Goku popped up in front of him, his eyes shining, "Really, Sanzo, we can have breakfast?" he asked excitedly.

"Yeah." Sanzo answered as he pulled on his leather shirt, arm guards, and robe. He finished by putting on his chest guard and his holy scripture. He looked for Goku, but the door was ajar and excited shouts were coming from downstairs.

Sighing, the monk exited the room, meeting Hakkai and Gojyo at the stairs, "My Sanzo, it's rather late, ne?" Hakkai said.

"Yeah, monk, how come we all weren't up before the sun?" Gojyo asked.

"I felt like sleeping in." Sanzo growled, his pissy attitude back in place.

"Gojyo and Hakkai gawked, "How did you manage to sleep through that storm?" Hakkai asked.

"I didn't, I fell asleep at 5 am after it ended, and now it is noon. I have slept for 7 hours, and you two have probably slept for that and more. Goku was up first, so his is ordering breakfast for us." Sanzo informed them.

Gojyo looked at the priest, "It's this late and you're letting us eat?" he asked.

"Yes, now I would advise you to go and order what you want before we leave in ten minutes." Sanzo added.

"Ten minutes too?!" The kappa said in disbelief, "Jeez, you get laid last night or something?"

Sanzo aimed form Gojyo's head, "Kidding!" yelled the hanyou as he raced to the kitchen.

Hakkai looked at Sanzo, "Was Goku alright last night? We both heard him yell." he asked.

Sanzo nodded, "Yeah, he was fine, I helped him relax."

Hakkai smiled, "…so I could think in quiet." Sanzo added hurriedly.

"Of course, my friend, of course." Hakkai responded.

"Damn you. I'd kill you, but you're the only sane one on this damned journey. No, if I had to kill someone, it would be those goddamn gods who sent us." Sanzo grumbled.

"Ah, yes, but if we weren't sent, who would be. The world would be in permanent chaos, and you would still be chased after for your scripture, better off having a good reason and something to look forward too." Hakkai argued sensibly.

"Damn you for being right. Whatever, they say if you want a job done right you've got to do it yourself." Sanzo said.

Hakkai smiled and stayed silent.

The two reached the kitchen to see their other two companions carrying piles of food taller than they were. The chef hurried out, "Ah, very good, the total comes to 5,000 yen." he said.

Sanzo twitched…and fired. Goku and Gojyo collapsed as pieces of the roof fell in, "WHEN I SAY YOU IDIOTS CAN HAVE BREAKFAST, I MEAN YOU CAN HAVE A MUFFIN AND SOME JUICE! NOT BEER, PORK BUNS, LOBSTER, CALAMARI, BURGERS, OMELETS, CIGARETTES, AND GODS KNOW WHAT ELSE YOU TWO BOUGHT!!!!!!!!!!!" he yelled.

"Maa maa, calm down Sanzo." Hakkai said.

Sanzo handed the credit card to the demon, "You pay for everything, I'm going to go wait with Hakurryu." He stalked to the door and turned around, "And keep those morons with you." he added.

Hakkai simply smiled as Sanzo rushed out in a huff and as he watched the two demons on the ground try to collect their beloved food. He sighed and went to the front desk to pay for their stay.

One hour and X-amounts of food later the ikkou was about 500 miles from the next town/ small village. Sanzo was sleeping, Gojyo was sipping a beer, Hakkai was driving, Hakuryuu was being a jeep, and Goku was sleeping too.

Gojyo threw his beer can off the side of the speeding jeep, "Hakkai?" he asked.

"Yes, Gojyo?" the demon answered.

"About last night…" Gojyo's voice trailed off.

"What about last night, my friend? If it's about the conversation about Kanan's child then…please, forget about it." Hakkai said softly.

"I can't…not yet anyway. Hakkai, I've known you for four years now and from that, I think that you really would have treated the child as your own, you aren't the kind of man that would beat or hurt someone because they were different." Gojyo told him.

The jeep screeched to a halt, jolting Sanzo and Goku into consciousness, 'What the fuck?!" Sanzo yelled.

"Yeah." Goku echoed.

Hakkai jumped out of the jeep, "Gojyo, come with me." he said, his voice hard.

"What are you doing, Hakkai?" Goku asked.

Hakkai turned to the two and gave the two a hard stare that made both of them want to

stay where they were, "There are things I need to talk to Gojyo about. Stay here, neither of you should know these things." He turned and with Gojyo walked into the forest.

They reached a small clearing and Hakkai stopped, "Go," He said, using his nickname for his friend, "There are some things you should know about me."

"What do you mean, Kai?" Gojyo asked.

Hakkai sighed, "When I was younger, back when I was Cho Gonou, I was a very cruel, racist, and temperamental man. As a child I hated demons because they were different, half demons because they were taboo, people of different races, religions, you name it, I hated it." Gojyo looked at his friend in shock.

Hakkai nodded, "Yes, I was a horrible man and I- I even helped kill those who were different. But…then I met Kanan, she was perfect. She was beautiful, witty, smart, and kind. She showed me how to be good, that everyone was equal. I became a new man. The truth is, Cho Gonou died when I met her, not when I became Cho Hakkai."

Gojyo nodded, "I understand, Kai, and I don't mind. You are a new man, a good man, and that's how I like you."

"Go…that night…when Kanan died, I became that man again, I had to kill those who were different once more. So I did…I killed all of those youkai because they were different, because they had killed my Kanan." Hakkai said.

"God, Kai…I never knew." Gojyo whispered.

"And then…I became a demon for my sins. I became what I hated as consequence for killing them. The pain of becoming something I was not was…excruciating. It felt as if my very soul was ripped from my body, molded into a new shape, then shoved back into me. Then, in a haze I made my way to where you found me and cut my stomach open." as he said this his hand unconsciously made it's way to cover his lower abdomen, "You found me there, a demon, a killer, lying in my own pool of blood and covered by the blood of others and you saved me, Go, you saved me."

Gojyo stared at his friend in silence, Hakkai had never told him the entire story of his past, but now…I was smacking him in the face like a dead fish. (Great analogy, ne? ) "God, Kai, I never…you never…I'm sorry." He effulged the man in a hug.

They stood like that for a while before Hakkai pulled back slightly, it was then that Gojyo noticed that the man was crying. Hakkai attempted the pull away and walk back to the jeep, but his legs refused to hold him up and he collapsed. Gojyo ran to his friend and caught him.

"You aren't alright, Kai, why don't we stay here for a while until you feel better." Gojyo advised.

"But…Sanzo will get mad at us…and the journey, I need to drive." Hakkai protested weakly, tears still streaming down his face.

"Kai, I'm sorry, but in this condition you'd drive us off a cliff." Gojyo said dryly, "I'll go tell Sanzo to break for lunch."

He started to walk back to the jeep when he heard a protest from Hakkai, "No, stay here, please." the older man said.

Gojyo turned around and walked to Hakkai, "You sure, man? That bouzo priest'll have our hides for sure."

Hakkai smiled, "I can handle him, he's a big softie under that asshole exterior."

"Ok, but until then, what do you propose we do?" the kappa asked.

"From his position on the forest floor he produced a deck of cards, "How about a few rounds of poker?" he asked.

"You read my mind." Gojyo said as he sat down next to his friend. He grabbed the deck of cards and started dealing.

Sanzo sat in his seat looking into the seemingly endless forest, "What the hell was up with Hakkai?" He mused aloud.

Goku picked up on it, "I don't know, Sanzo, do you? He seemed really mad."

Sanzo grunted, "Whatever it is that's bothering Hakkai, he'll tell Gojyo. We don't have to worry about him."

"Ok, Sanzo." Goku said.

The forest fell silent.

"Ano…Sanzo…?"

"What."

"I'm hungry."

**THWACK**

"Itaiiiiiiiii…"

Gojyo yawned, it was well past dusk, "Yo, Kai?" he asked.

"Mmmm…yes Go?" Hakkai mumbled.

"You ready to head back yet?"

Hakkai looked to the side, "Not yet, I have to do something first."

Gojyo looked at Hakkai concernedly, "What is it?"

Hakkai turned back to his friend, the tearstains from earlier still slightly visible, 'Can you come over here, Go?" Hakkai asked.

"Sure, Kai." The hanyou replied and he moved closer so that he was sitting directly across from the older demon. "What is it?" He asked.

"Go…over the last few days I've been feeling something very different towards you and…Go, close your eyes for a moment." Hakkai said in an odd tone.

"Ok." and he obliged. He felt warm breath ghost over his ear, but he did not move. He sat perfectly still, eyes closed, until he felt soft lips cover his own. His body immediately tensed up and Hakkai's lips quickly left his.

"I…I'm falling in love with you Gojyo…I'm sorry." Hakkai said, his voice barely audible.

Gojyo was silent, "I-it's alright if you d-don't feel th-the same w-way, m-my friend." Hakkai said, his tears beginning to fall again.

Hakkai turned away from the scarlet haired man and faced the woods. He felt a pair of strong arms circle his body, "G-go?" he asked.

He heard Gojyo sigh, "I can't say I'm falling in love with you, Kai, but I do like you as more than a friend. This…this is very confusing and right now I'm not sure of what I should say in return, but I don't hate you, I love you as a friend and a little more. Full blown love isn't what I feel now, then again, I've never felt it before, so I don't know. Don't give up on me just yet." Hakkai felt his love's lips press against his neck and he gasped. The lips sucked and nipped at the skin, effectively forming a small hickey.

"There," the kappa grinned, "Now I've got sometime to sort myself out."

Hakkai touched the spot where Gojyo's lips had been and smiled, "Of course I'll wait." he said.

"Good," Gojyo said, "Now, what say we head back to the jeep," he laughed, "We're certainly in for a beating from the bouzo houshi."

Hakkai smiled and nodded, "Yes, let's go." he grabbed Gojyo's hand, squeezed it, then took off in a sprint for the jeep, "Race you!" he called back.

Gojyo stared at the man, then took off running too, "Why that son of a bitch…" he said, smiling.

It was dusk and Goku and Sanzo had been sitting in silence for nearly four hours when Goku couldn't take it anymore, "Sanzo," he asked impatiently, "Where are they, I'm hungry."

"Shut up," the monk replied, "They obviously aren't here."

Goku was quiet for a few minutes after that, at a loss for something to discuss. It was then that he thought of waking up in Sanzo's arms. The monkey king blushed, "Ano…Sanzo?" he asked.

The priest grunted in reply.

"Why…why did you sleep with me last night?" Goku asked, not seeing the full implications of his question.

"Nani?!" Sanzo nearly yelled, his face turning red in the dimming light.

"Why were you there this morning?" Goku repeated.

Sanzo sighed, he might as well tell the monkey the truth…that is, the slightly warped, asshole monk version of the story. "You were having a nightmare and you wouldn't shut up until I lay down next to you. You were making so much goddamn noise that I couldn't think, much less sleep." he said calmly.

Goku's eyes looked disappointed for a second, "But…why weren't you wearing your robes, or a shirt? And why was I wrapped in your arms against your chest?" Goku asked.

Sanzo twitched, the monkey's questions were so naïve, even though he now idea how hard they were getting to answer, "I got too warm with you there, and you wouldn't stop thrashing around until I held you." he answered. 'Smooth, Sanzo.' he thought with a smirk

"Oh…" Goku said, "It was…nice…" he added in a small voice.

Sanzo grunted, acknowledging the statement, 'What the fuck do I say to that?' he asked himself, 'I liked it too.' he admitted, and as he did so he felt a wall around his heart crash down. "DAMMIT!" He swore aloud.

Goku looked at Sanzo fearfully, "I'm sorry." he said and ducked.

"Shut up, saru." Sanzo said.

Goku looked at Sanzo oddly, "Hai." he replied quickly.

The sage looked in the direction that Hakkai and Gojyo had gone off in and to his surprise he saw the two men returning, each with a slight smile on their faces. "Hakkai! Gojyo!" Goku yelled happily.

"Hey, Goku!" Gojyo yelled back, "How are you and the bouzo houshi?"

In less than two seconds, Sanzo's Smith and Wesson was cocked and aimed at the red headed hanyou. "Didn't mean it!" Gojyo yelled, "I was kidding, lighten up, blondie!"

The two made their way to the jeep, "What took you two so long?" Goku asked.

"Oh, it was nothing, Goku, don't you worry about it." Hakkai answered, smiling.

"Ok." Goku was quiet for a moment, "Hey, Hakkai?" he asked.

"Yes, Goku?" Hakkai answered.

"…I'm hungry…"

Hakkai handed him a pork bun that seemingly came from nowhere. Gojyo and Sanzo sweat dropped, "Here you go, Goku." Hakkai said.

"Yay!" Goku yelled happily, shoving the pork bun in his mouth in one bite.

Hakkai looked over at Sanzo, "I propose that we stay here for the night, Sanzo." he said.

Sanzo grunted, "Fine, but we're outta here before light." he said.

"Awwww, Sanzooooo." Goku whined.

"Yeah, come on, it's not like a few extra hours of sleep'll make a difference." Gojyo complained.

Sanzo glared at the kappa, "Well, while you two were off in the forest, I got plenty of sleep, it's you own fault that you aren't getting as much sleeping time as you would have had you been in this car and Hakkai driving." he explained in a monotone.

Gojyo glared at the priest and instead of retaliating, plopped down in his seat next to the monkey, "Fine, we'll leave early, but it's your fault if I accidentaly let you die because of my sleep deprived state."

"Feh, go to bed, kappa."

Gojyo grumpily agreed, but before he drifted off, he muttered something that sounded suspiciously like, 'bouzo houshi…'

It had to have been 3 am when Sanzo was shaken into consciousness by the jeep rolling onto it's side, placing all four of the men in a very awkward position: Sanzo sprawled over Hakkai, and Gojyo half on top of Goku. This resulted in mass confusion…well…not _mass _confusion, but it certainly caused a degree of it.

"Get off me, you stupid lecherous, pervy kappa!" Goku shouted, trying to shove the slightly dazed hanyou off of him.

Gojyo moaned and with a slightly strained effort, managed to roll off the boy, "Ugh," he muttered, "I hit my head on the side of the fuckin' jeep." he attempted to stand up, but collapsed, "Shit, now I can't even see straight." he cursed.

"Gojyo," Hakkai said worriedly from under a now unconscious Sanzo. He heaved the older man off of him, trying to be gentle, then rushed to his best friend, "What's wrong?" he asked.

"Shit, Kai, when the fuck did you get a clone? There are fucking two of you, and the trees are moving in a circle." He looked over at the unconscious houshi, "SHIT MOTHER FUCKER! THERE ARE TWO FUCKING ASSHOLES OVER THERE!" he screeched.

Hakkai looked at his friend, a very concerned look on his face, "Go, I think you have a very serious concussion. Do you feel sick? Is anything spinning?" he asked.

Gojyo looked at what he thought was Hakkai, "Uhhh…yeah, lots of spinning," he blinked a few times and tried to rub his eyes, but his hands missed completely, "Ugh…yeah, my stomach hurts too, hell, my whole body hurts, being dumped out of the jeep and onto the monkey, slamming your head in the process is not fun or pleasurable."

Hakkai pushed his friend down gently, "Gojyo, I want you to lay still, I'm going to use my chi to heal you. If you move around any more than needed, you could cause permanent damage."

Goku looked over at Hakkai and Gojyo from his position next to Sanzo, "Is Gojyo alright, Hakkai?" he asked.

Hakkai did not answer, instead he straddled Gojyo, much to the kappa's surprise (and slight pleasure) so that his hands were on either side of the half breeds head, his head bent dangerously close to Gojyo's. He slowly pushed his energy into his fingertips and outward into his best friends head in a pulsating green glow.

Immediately after Hakkai had finished healing the hanyou, he collapsed, his energy drained from using his chi and very little rest. He lay on Gojyo, completely covering his friend with his body. Luckily, it was dark so Goku couldn't see the two men in a slightly…provocative position.

"I'm sorry, Go. Please let me stay here for a minute, I don't think I can move very well." Hakkai said, his voice reflecting the strain and exhaustion in his body.

Gojyo, in a random-act-of-tenderness, put his arms around the youkai, "S'ok, man, I probably owe you my life."

Hakkai smiled into the man's shoulder, "Thanks, Go." he said.

The tender moment, sadly, was interrupted by a loud crash, followed by a string of swearing from the monk, and a cry of pain from Goku.

The crash had been from Goku: he was trying to be nice and getting some water for his unconscious master, but on his way to Sanzo he had tripped over a food basket. He lost his balance and fell on the monk, spilling every last drop of water on the poor man. It immediately woke the poor man up in a very unpleasant way, effectively eliciting a long string of swears. Upon finishing his rant, he took out a slightly soggy paper fan and proceeded to beat Goku upside the head, causing the boy to cry out in protest.

"I'm not stupid, Sanzo, I was just trying to help!" Goku yelled.

"Shut up, you dumbass monkey, now I'm wet because of your stupidity." he put the fan away, "Ugh, sometimes I wish I'd never let the damned gods talk me into bringing you, you stupid saru." he muttered.

It was that moment that Sanzo finally crossed the line. Goku looked up at his caretaker in shock, "I-is that how you really feel about me, Sanzo?" he asked, tears welling up in his eyes.

Sanzo shook his hair out, much like a dog, "Why do you think I said it? I don't lie."

"Oh…" Goku's voice trailed off and his tears began to fall. Hakkai and Gojyo watched the scene play out in horror, Goku was a sensitive kid, and now that this had happened…

"Ok, Sanzo, I'll leave…you don't want me around!" he shouted, his voice rising with every word, "I love you, Sanzo! I'm sorry…good bye." he turned and ran off into the depths of the forest.

Sanzo, who had been in the middle of getting a cigarette, dropped the pack and stared after the saru, his mouth open and eyes wide. He tried to yell after Goku, but his voice refused to work, so instead he took off after the boy.

Gojyo watched the priest run off after his charge, "Whoa…harsh…" he muttered.

Hakkai nodded into the red haired man's shoulder, 'God…I love you so much, Go.' he thought sadly, 'I wish you would return my feelings.'

Just then a loud snarl came from the other side of Hakuryuu. The dragon-jeep immediately transformed and after the light died, a snarling youkai was revealed, "So, Cho Gonou…we meet again."

**TBC…**

A/N: Howdy ya'll! It's me, Dragid. Wow…it's been quite awhile since I last posted something ;;; Gomen nasai, minna-san!

I hope you all like this story, and I do plan on actually finishing this because I already have a lovely sequel planned out concerning Hakkai's past. Since I really want to write it, I need to set the scene for it and write this. Don't worry, this story is a lot of fun to write so I wont be stopping anytime soon.

If you already know me for my…er…lack of updating skills, I'm hoping to get every story I have up already a new chapter. Oh yes, and my other pen name: Dolphin Sky, will be deleted and all stories moved to this pen name.

Well, I'm gonna start on the next chapter now, it should take me a week and a half if I work on it a decent amount of time, and since I got my new laptop, I write all the time

Have fun, and remember: The writers here thrive on feedback for their stories, so please review, it doesn't take more than a minute or two. Arigatou if you review, and the first reviewer gets to have the second chapter dedicated to them.

**MoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO……….**


	2. Enemy

A/N: HA! A new chapter, I rule the world, BOW BEFORE ME! Anyway, since I know that my wonderful reviewers will love this (or hate it . . ) Here you go, a nice little chapter

Trust

Chapter 2: Faith

"So Cho Gonou…we meet again."

Hakkai looked over at the man from his position on the scarlet haired hanyou, his eyes wide. "What do you want with me?" he asked, slowly struggling to pick himself up.

"You killed my brethren, now you die!" screamed the youkai.

"Who the hell are you?" Gojyo asked, helping his friend to his feet.

"I? I am Kou Tenkou, servant to Lord Homura. I was away from my brothers, delivering a message for the lord of the tribe. I returned and found every last one of them dead! Except…for one. My youngest brother, only 10 years old was still barely alive, he told me that you, Cho Gonou, killed my family! YOU KILLED A CHILD!" he yelled angrily, his voice rising in volume with each sentence.

Hakkai looked at the assassin with cold eyes, "I am Cho Hakkai, Cho Gonou died years ago." he told the demon quietly.

"Ha!" the youkai laughed, "I know a killer when I see one, even if you didn't carry tiny traces of being the murderer of my brethren, you have killed many others like myself…like yourself." his eyes narrowed dangerously.

"This tells me too!" he screamed and quickly, faster than light, he had appeared at the green-eyed man's side, slashed off the bottom of his shirt, and gone back to his defensive position by where the jeep had been.

Hakkai's shirt slowly drifted to the ground, revealing a jagged area of white skin on his flat stomach exposed. "See?!" the assassin continued, "You also bear the remnants of the wound that resulted from your sin! And to think…" he sniggered, "A man of the Christian faith too…how sinful."

Hakkai stared at the demon, "I have told you once, and I will tell you again, I am Cho Hakkai. My sins that I committed years ago are not atoned for, and never will be, for taking a life is against the will of God. I am a sinner who tries every second of my life repaying my debt." he said forcefully, but quietly too.

The youkai stared him down, "The only way to pay for the deaths of my friends…my family…IS FOR YOU TO DIE!" he screamed, "BASTARD! I'LL KILL YOU!"

Fueled by his anger, Tenkou charged at his enemies. The two men dodged, but just barely, the attackers lengthened claws taking off a shoulder of Hakkai's shirt. Hakkai looked around wildly, searching for any sign of his attacker. Gojyo summoned his shakujo and standing back-to-back with his best friend, searched for the demon.

Suddenly, he was there, first in front of Hakkai, then in front of Gojyo. He smiled evilly and with a fluid movement, had punched through Gojyo's stomach.

"Ungh…" Gojyo groaned through clenched teeth as he collapsed to the ground, blood pouring from his wound.

"Gojyo!" Hakkai screamed, trying to heal his love.

"Not so fast, Gonou." The demon hissed, lunging at the distressed man.

Hakkai threw himself over Gojyo, trying to protect the injured hanyou. He braced himself for the death blow, but it never came. Instead, a gunshot, followed by an agonized scream, rang throughout the woods.

Hakkai raised his head to see his savior and watched Sanzo, with and unconscious Goku on his back, lower his gun and replace it in his robe, "If you're trying to get killed, then do it yourself." he said coldly, hoisting the monkey up on his back as he slipped, which ruined his cold look.

Hakkai nodded, then turned worriedly back to the scarlet haired man, who was groaning and bleeding profusely. Hakkai quickly put his hands on Gojyo's chest and pushed. Although it was hard, he found the stream of green glowing energy inside him and poured it out into the wounded man.

Hakkai found himself nearly unable to close the wound, but somehow managed to do so with his limited strength. The wound slowly closed itself, leaving a trace of pink skin. Hakkai smiled weakly at his friend before swaying slightly and collapsing to the ground. Gojyo managed to move his body so that the majority of the green-eyed man's weight fell on him.

"Sorry, friend." Gojyo muttered,

The demon watched the two from his position where jeep had been, holding the stub where his arm had been, 'So, Cho Gonou, you love this dirty half-breed…I will use this to my advantage.' he thought deviously.

He stood and bowed at Gojyo, whose eyes narrowed considerably, "Tell Gonou dear that I must be off, but I would dearly like to play again soon." and with that he disappeared.

Gojyo ran to his friend, "Kai? Kai?! Come on, Kai, wake up!" he yelled as he watched the older man's chest rise up and down in ragged breaths.

Sanzo kneeled beside Gojyo, "He'll live, you know that he is much stronger than he looks." Gojyo nodded, words unable to come from his mouth, "Besides," the monk stood up, "If he truly wants to die, then he will. If you want him to live, then give him something to live for." the monk turned and walked off, the unconscious monkey king still clinging to his back.

Gojyo sighed and hoisted his friend onto his back, "I don't know what I can tell you, Kai. I know you love me, and I know I love you as more than a friend…but I'm not sure if it's that much." he followed Sanzo's steps, "Although…right now I' m afraid you'll die and if you do then I don't know what would happen then."

Hakkai, as if sensing that Gojyo was his source of warmth, snuggled closer to his love's back. This seemed to help him seeing as how his breathing began to even out. Gojyo sighed and walked to where the monk was standing.

The two men looked out at the now setting sun, "It's pretty, isn't it?" Gojyo said softly, "After all this shit that happened today it's kind of nice."

Sanzo nodded slightly, his eyes still locked on the scarlet clouds, "Yeah…" he agreed, his voice trailing off.

Gojyo was silent for a few moments before his curiosity got the better of him, "So," he said, "What happened between you and the monkey in the woods?"

Sanzo chuckled and lifted a cigarette to his lips, "If you're expecting something romantic, It's not gonna happen," he turned his head towards his feet, "The damned kid ran into a tree and knocked himself out."

Gojyo laughed, "Sounds like the typical Goku thing to do."

"Yeah…" Sanzo agreed quietly.

Gojyo wanted to see what was bothering the priest, but he wisely chose against it, and instead gently put Hakkai down, set up a bed for him, then lay him down. He was about to set up his own bedroll, when he noticed that Hakkai was having the same problems as before and shivering uncontrollably.

He looked over at Sanzo, then at Hakkai. Sanzo nodded and Gojyo climbed in the bed next to his friend and held him close, like the night before. Hakkai almost immediately curled into Gojyo's chest and stopped shivering. Gojyo smiled at Hakkai's seemingly quickly recovery and went to sleep.

Sanzo watched the two men sleep from his spot watching the sunset. Goku's weight suddenly seemed to weigh on his shoulders so he unceremoniously dropped Goku on his butt. However, instead of waking up, he simply lay there limply, his body sprawled out in the grass.

Sanzo groaned, "Last time, monkey." he said and set up a single bed. He pulled the monkey next to him and went to sleep.

A few days later the group was back on the road. Goku and Hakkai's conditions were far more serious than they had originally thought, so they had camped out in the forest. There was also the fact that only Hakkai could drive the jeep, mainly because Goku couldn't be trusted, Sanzo couldn't be bothered, and Gojyo, well let's save that story for another time.

Goku, the ever rechargeable monkey, recovered within a day, but Hakkai was a very stressed, weakened, and wounded man. He took two days to wake up, another to recover, and one more to be able to get up and walk around without falling.

It was then that Sanzo ordered them to go, they had already lost enough time as it was hanging around this forest. Sadly, after hours of driving around, they realized that they were trapped.

Gojyo groaned, "Ugh, Kami-sama knows I'll get trapped in a cave with some other long-lost relative," he paused, "I vote the bouzo to go."

Sanzo growled and cocked his Smith and Wesson and Gojyo ignored it, "Come on, you damn corrupted monk, it's been your turn to go for quite a while."

"I must say that I agree, Sanzo." Hakkai chirped.

"Yeah, Sanzo, you always send me!" Goku piped in.

The ranting about how Sanzo never did anything went on for quite a bit, also giving Goku and Gojyo the chance to see that Sanzo's constant threats to kill them were completely empty. "FINE!" The priest yelled irritably, "I'll go, so shut the fuck up!"

"I'll come too, Sanzo!" Goku offered.

"Fine," grumbled the monk, "Move your ass though, I'm not waiting all day."

"Ok!" The monkey answered before jumping out of the jeep to Sanzo's side, "Besides," he continued, We don't need you getting lost like Gojyo last time."

Sanzo muttered something unintelligible and stalked off into the woods, his eager charge trailing close behind.

Gojyo took out a cigarette and lit it, "Well, Kai, looks like it's just us for a while."

"I suppose so." Hakkai bent over and rummaged around in his bag. He grabbed the desired items and nimbly leapt over the seat so he was next to Gojyo. He grinned as he held up a bottle of his favorite rum and a deck of cards.

Gojyo grinned in return, "I like how you think, man." he said and grabbed the booze.

The two men began to play poker as the sun set over the line of trees and as the night wore on the two men shared as many bottles of wine as they had. Gojyo finally threw down another losing hand and lay back, his eyes directed at the stars, "It's a nice night tonight, wouldn't you agree, 'Kai?"

His friend gave no answer so Gojyo turned his head to see why his friend hadn't answered and was surprised out of his mind to find Hakkai passed out in his seat. Gojyo flicked his lightly and the demon made no response. The hanyou whistled, "Well I'm be damned by the devil, Hakkai's fucking drunk for the first time ever." he laughed.

Gojyo turned his gaze back to the sky, not noticing the small grin on his friend's face.

Hakkai was currently pretending to be drunk so as to get Gojyo to not pay attention to him, so he moaned quietly and shifted his dead weight towards Gojyo so that his body fell onto the kappa's lap. This was generally very un-Hakkai like, but he was currently freezing and he didn't need his love worrying.

Gojyo felt Hakkai's weight fall onto his lap and he looked down in surprise at the brown haired youkai. He went to move when he felt the other man shiver involuntarily and snuggle closer into his lap. Gojyo chuckled, now it was getting a bit obvious that Hakkai was most definitely not drunk. However, Gojyo was not homophobic, his best friend was too 'proud' to admit how cold he was, Hakkai had been his best friend for over five years now, plus he did like the demon as more than a friend, so he let him rest on his lap. As if assuring Hakkai that it was ok, he slung an arm over the demon's waist and let it hang there. "G'night, Kai." he mumbled as he drifted off. But before he was completely asleep, he heard his friend murmur softly, "Good night, Go."

Needless to say, Gojyo slept with a smile.

Sanzo stalked off into the woods, the ever cheerful monkey trailing in his wake. For quite some time Goku followed the monk in silence, something Sanzo hadn't experienced for nearly six or seven years now and he savored it. At last Goku couldn't not talk anymore, "Hey Sanzo?" he asked.

Without realizing that Goku had been silent to soften his mood, the monk answered in a fairly kind tone, "Yes, Goku?"

"It's smells….weird in these woods, like something isn't right." Goku said, his brow creased in worry.

Sanzo nodded, "Yeah, I noticed it a few minutes after we left Gojyo and Hakkai in the jeep."

The two men continued to walk further into the woods, each looking warily about them into the forest. Someone was watching them and Sanzo had a good idea of who it was.

**A/N:** Hello everyone who has read and reviewed my story, or is planning on it sometime in the future. I'm sorry that this chapter and how short it is, but I'd rather have to leave you guys off with a huge, unbearably annoying cliffhanger, as opposed to a somewhat smaller to no cliffhanger. Seeing as how it generally takes me a few weeks to update and all…

Well, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, if you catch any errors then feel free to tell me in a review.

As to those of you who reviewed, here are my thanks and answers to questions:

**Crimson1: **First off, Thank you so much for reviewing my story!!!!!! You are one of my favorite writers on this site and I think your stories are very well written and have a great deal of talent. Once more, I thank you.

**Reina-183:** I took your advice and made the chapters shorter than before, hopefully this will get me more readers. Thank you very much for your advice and your review! Oh yes, and um…that wasn't _me_ who walked out of the sermon, that was my friend Rob 3. Sorry if you thought otherwise, I was just relating a story he told me and my friends at an acting program I do in the summer. ;

**Chobit 00: **Feel free to seduce Goku if you wish, I want Hakkai Hmm, that just gave me a good idea, reviewers are allowed to claim characters from Saiyuki in my story now! Thank you for the idea Chobit 00-san!!

**Wilson: **Ack! I _am_ going to finish this! I promise! Oh yeah, about Dokugakoji and his mom, I heard this from a source that could or couldn't be very reliable. I'm pretty sure that this is revealed in Saiyuki Reloaded. I figured that it could be a decent angle to work with later on, or in sequels. Thank you for your review!

**Owners**

**Dragid** - Hakkai

**Chobit 00 **- Goku


	3. Memories

A/N: Ack! People are threatening to kill me in my sleep if I don't update within a decent amount of time, so I'm writing this now. Please don't kill me, if you do, no one will be around to finish this story.

Chapter 3: **Memories**

Sanzo and Goku walked along the faint paths, both their brows creased in worry, they knew that it should have taken them only 15 minutes or so to find an exit, but the sky had already turned pitch black. At long last Sanzo gave up and sat down against a tree, taking out his cigarettes and lighting one as he did so.

Goku stopped walking and stood in front of Sanzo, "How can you just sit now?! There's someone after us, we've got to find an exit!" He yelled.

Sanzo sighed, "Don't be stupid, monkey, we've already played into this guy's trap. He's successfully separated us and trapped us in these woods. We're not leaving unless we kill him, and since he wants to kill us he'll have to show up eventually. So, instead of wasting my energy, I'm going to sit here and wait." the monk said in an exasperated tone.

"Oh," Goku said as he lowered himself to a seat next to his owner.

Sanzo glanced over at the monkey he was forced to travel with and noticed, with some level of disturbance, that his charge was perfectly silent and he seemed to be deep in thought. The monk shrugged inwardly and turned the other way, sinking slowly into his own thoughts.

Sanzo's thoughts were given free reign to wander and backtrack over any and all memories he had, and thankfully they chose not to wander back to the death of his dear master. However, they instead drifted to the teachings he had learned all those years ago.

_Komyou Sanzo sat high in an apple tree smoking a cigarette and drinking a flask of fine wine from the temples supplies. Kouryuu made his way to the tree with a broom, sweeping the path as he went. He could smell the familiar scent of smoke that followed his master around, along with the sweet smell of fermented wines._

_Kouryuu stopped sweeping and looked up into the tree, he caught a glimpse of a long brown braid and the creamy color of his master's robes. "Master Sanzo?" He called, "What are you doing up there? The other monks are looking for you!"_

_Kouryuu knew what was coming next. He heard the cheerful laugh of his master as he poked fun at Kouryuu's fake concern for the wishes of the other inhabitants of their temple. "Stop pretending you care, Kouryuu." his master called back, "Besides, it is far to nice outside to be teaching those stuffy sermons inside those even stuffier rooms around the thick-headed monks. Why don't you join me, Kouryuu, I know you'd enjoy a private lesson out in the sun." _

_"Of course, Master." Kouryuu said, a light coming to his purple eyes. Without a sound he dropped the broom and nimbly leapt up the trunk of the tree and perched on a thick branch next to the priest._

_Komyou seem not to notice him young student, but instead gazed up at the ripe red apples, "Kouryuu," he said at last, "I believe today is the day I teach you the difference between rejoicing that past, and living in it."_

_"But Master, I already know this." Kouryuu pointed out politely._

_Sanzo laughed, "But do you? Let me ask you something Kouryuu, what would you do if something happened to this temple and I was no longer here to guide you?"_

_Kouryuu was shocked, "But, why ask me such a question, Master? You are plenty strong enough to defend us."_

_"I just wish to know…call it plain curiosity if you will." Sanzo said, his normally smiling mouth beginning to form a frown._

_Kouryuu looked to the treetops, "I would mourn for you, then I would most likely leave this temple and make my way in the world using my own strength and your teachings to guide me." he answered._

_Komyou nodded, "Very good, Kouryuu, if this reason and knowledge of yours keeps up, you will be a Sanzo like myself one day and have control over one of the scriptures I carry." He plucked an apple from the tree and tossed it to his student, "Remember this, Kouryuu, do not dwell in the past, it will only make you weak. Instead, remember and use those past experiences to learn and grow."_

_Kouryuu nodded and looked up at his master, "I will, sir." _

_Komyou smiled once more, "Now, run ahead and finish your chores. I will be here when you are done, then perhaps we will make paper airplanes."_

_"Of course, Master." Kouryuu went to leap to the ground when his master added something._

_"Oh yes, and please do not tell the other monks where I have gone for today." He winked at his pupil and went back to smoking his cigarette,_

_Kouryuu let a rare smile loose as he jumped from the tree and resumed his duties._

Sanzo slowly reverted from memory to real life as he heard crying sounds from his own pupil next to him, '_Gods, I never bet my Master had as much trouble with me.'_ he thought irritably.

Sanzo sighed, "What is it, monkey?" he asked.

Goku lifted his head, it was obvious that he had been crying for some time, his face was splattered with tears, "I was just thinking," he muttered.

"I'm not a mind reader, you're going to have to tell me, because I'm sure as hell not going to guess." Sanzo retorted.

Goku was silent for a few minutes before he spoke, "I was thinking about…what happened a few days ago."

"When you ran into that tree instead of being sensible enough to see that I wasn't going to hit you because of the seriousness of the matter?" The monk said to him, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"I'm sorry, Sanzo, I shouldn't have said anything, I don't know what came over me." Goku apologized.

Sanzo lowered his head, "Shut up." he said.

Goku raised his head to look at Sanzo, "What?" he asked nervously.

"I said, shut up." Sanzo replied, "I know you meant what you said, stupid."

"What?" Goku asked again, this time even more surprised.

"I know you meant it, I'm not deaf or dumb." He tossed his cigarette on the dirt floor of the forest, "I can't return your feelings."

"What?! Why?!" Goku nearly yelled, "I've never cared about anyone so mu-" Goku cut himself off, images of a strange man that strongly resembled Sanzo flashed through his head. That man…Goku had seen him so many times before, he knew that this golden haired person was from the part of his memory that was locked away. Suddenly, as if a great puzzle had been

given another piece, a name finally came with that picture, "Konzen…" he whispered.

Sanzo heard that name and a pain ran through his heart, Goku had cared for someone else, long before Sanzo had rescued him from his prison in the mountains. But…it was a familiar name, one the monk recognized, yet did not know.

He lit a new cigarette, "I knew it, there was someone else you loved." he said bitterly.

Goku watched Sanzo, "No…" he whispered, "Konzen, whoever he is, died. I love _you_ now, Sanzo, please don't reject me!" he said, his voice gaining volume with every word.

"I will and I am." Sanzo replied, his next retort sent tiny daggers into his own ice heart, "Even if I did love you, our number one priority is to stop Kougaji and whoever is controlling him from resurrecting Gyumaoh."

"B-but, Sanzo!" Goku cried.

Sanzo turned his head sharply to look at the monkey king, "Shut up and accept it, my mind is not going to change. I have no regrets in my life and I don't plan to start having them now. What's done is done, it can't be changed, don't dwell on it. Only fools dwell in regrets."

Goku was about to reply when an icy voice cut in, "Oh my, how very touching, the young boy confesses his undying love for the icy monk, but, alas, he is rejected. For another lover, mayhap? Or maybe the priest really does harbor regret…maybe…the death of his master?" Tenkou chuckled as his appeared.

Sanzo turned and shot at the demon, "Shut up, you damn bastard, I'll send you back to hell." he spat.

The demon laughed, "Touched a nerve, didn't I, Kouryuu? Wondering how I know about that when not even the boy there has found out?"

Sanzo glared at him, his gun trained on the demon.

"Ha! What fun it is to play with you all," a gunshot pierced the night sky, "Touchy aren't we, young Sanzo? Well, if you must know, I was the very demon who killed your precious master!"

Sanzo's eyes opened in shock and his gun arm wavered, "Master…" he whispered.

His memories flooded into his head and he unwillingly went back to that night when his master had fallen, leaving him the name of Sanzo, past teachings, and the Maten scripture. The monk fell to his knees, his gun falling as his hands clutched his head.

Goku flew to his love's side, "Sanzo?! Sanzo?! Stop it, Sanzo!" he yelled, the tears still pouring from his eyes at the sight of Sanzo breaking like that.

He slowly rose to face the demon, "How dare you do that to him." Goku said forcefully, "His past is not your business!" He screamed in fury as he charged at the demon.

Tenkou smiled, "How fun you are, Son Goku." he said as the monkey king charged at him, the fury in his eyes coming out to grasp the evil demon.

Tenkou didn't see the danger he was in until it was too late, Goku ran his heart straight through, "How could you kill me, Son Goku? Why didn't you break, like your lover? You were supposed to die and help my torture of Gonou." he said as he died.

Goku stood at the demon's body and kicked it, "Bastard, I'm not that weak and Sanzo is not my lover." he turned from the body and walked the other way, "Oh yeah," he added, "His name is Hakkai, not Gonou. I should know, it took me ages to learn." he said coldly.

He hurried to where Sanzo was kneeling, his face the very picture of pain and agony. "Sanzo!" he yelled as he shook the monk's shoulders, "Snap out of it! He's dead, Sanzo, I killed him, I killed him." he told the tortured man, the blood from the demon soaking through Sanzo's robes and into his skin.

Sanzo let out a pained scream, "Master!" he yelled.

"Sanzo stop it!" Goku yelled.

Sanzo began to thrash around, the memories of his past coming at a rate that was killing the priest.

Goku, in a panicked attempt, threw his arms around Sanzo, but the monk wouldn't stop. "Please, Sanzo, you're scaring me." Goku cried.

"Get off me!" Sanzo yelled.

Goku held the man tighter, "I wont!" He screamed back, "Not until you stop!" and in a last, desperate attempt, crushed his lips to Sanzo's in a passionate kiss. '_I can't live without my sun'_ he thought desperately, _'Please come back, Sanzo!'_

Sanzo's purple eyes widened at the strange feeling that flowed through him, along with familiar words that seemed to appear from nowhere, '_Don't live in the past, if you do, you are weak.' _ it then said,_ 'Be strong, Kouryuu.' _ the words and feelings severed his past from the present.

He could finally see the young man in front of him, kissing him in a desperate attempt to save him, that had worked. He let out a rare smile and pushed Goku away weakly, "Thanks." he said to Goku for the first time in five years, then collapsed against his charge.

Goku was just standing up, the unconscious monk in his arms, when Hakkai and Gojyo ran into the clearing, "What happened?!" Hakkai shouted frantically.

Goku stood up straight and smiled, "I killed him for you, Hakkai, he's gone. I'm alive, so is Sanzo, we just had a little trouble with that bastard." he said.

Hakkai jogged to Sanzo and Goku, "Let me at least heal his…wounds?" he said, noticing that Sanzo was perfectly fine in body, "Isn't he injured?" Hakkai asked.

Goku began walking, "He's fine, don't worry about it, man."

Gojyo ran up beside the monkey, "So, chimp, what'd the asshole do, faint like a pussy." he teased.

"Shut up, Gojyo." Goku said.

"Aw, c'mon, monkey boy, what happened?" Gojyo insisted.

Hakkai drew Gojyo back, "I don't think this is a good time to provoke him, Gojyo, not with Sanzo like this." Hakkai whispered.

Gojyo nodded reluctantly, "But only till the bastard of a monk wakes up." he grumbled.

Hakkai grinned, "It warms my heart to see you so kind, my friend."

Gojyo growled, "Shut up, Kai." he said, his use of his friend's nickname not putting much emphasis on the threat.

Hakkai just grinned and continued to walk.

The four men slowly made their way back to the jeep. It actually did not take that long after they figured out that Tenkou possessed the power of illusion as well, making it seem as though they were about a mile or so from their camp, when in reality they were in a clearing about five minutes due east of Hakuryuu.

They laid Sanzo in the backseat with Goku while Gojyo took the unconscious monk's usual seat up front next to Hakkai. "Looks like I have to act like a bastard houshi now." Gojyo joked as he leapt in next to Hakkai.

"Hey!" Goku yelled in response, "Sanzo isn't a bastard!"

"Aha! Something did happen between you and the asshole back there!" Gojyo wiggled his eyebrows at Goku, "So clue me in, you two fuck or something?"

Goku turned bright red as his mind flew to the kiss he had given Sanzo, followed by the monk's thanks, "W-what?! Hell no!"

"Are you getting hotter Goku? Or is it just me?" Gojyo teased, "Goku's gay!"

Goku decided to use something Hakkai had taught him on the pervy kappa, reverse psychos or something like that. He stuck out his tongue, "So what if I do like Sanzo? At least I admit it!" he retorted.

This time it was Gojyo's turn to turn red, "What're you getting at, monkey?!"

Goku pointed at him, "I know you like Hakkai! I've read your stupid little diary, I know all about your secret love!"

Hakkai screeched to a stop and the other two conscious men turned to look at him. Hakkai was smiling, "We're here, this looks like a decent little establishment." he stated cheerfully.

He turned to Goku, "Would you mind looking after Sanzo for a few moments while I go book us some rooms?" Hakkai asked politely.

"Sure Hakkai!" Goku exclaimed, ready and willing to help his friend.

"Excellent, Gojyo, you come with me." he ordered.

"Of course, oh great Sanzo two." Gojyo agreed teasingly, but he was secretly worried about how Hakkai was taking Goku's little comment.

As if Hakkai could read Gojyo's mind he spoke quietly as they entered the establishment, "We'll let Goku watch Sanzo tonight, I think I should talk to you." he said.

Gojyo nodded, wondering about the events of the night to come.

A/N: So how was it? Did this chapter live up to everyone's expectations? I hope so, feel free to review, I would love it very much. Also, if you're a member of , please try to sign in before you review if you feel like it. I accept anonymous reviews, but it's so much easier to email people to tell them when new chapters are up than trying to see if the name you leave me is real.

Thank you very much everyone, especially to those of you who have reviewed chapters 1 and 2, I love you all!!!!!!!!!

Please tell me if I've made any errors or if there is anything that I've unintentionally made unclear or confusing or something. Oh yes, I'm not especially sure how you spell 'Komyou' and 'Kouryuu' so please tell me how to spell them if you know, I'd look them up myself, but my Sukiyaki box set (EPS. 1-50!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) is on lone to my friend. Thank you all very very much, I appreciate your reviews more then you know!

P.S. Flames shall be used to burn down your house!

Please push the pretty purplish button down there!


	4. Discussion

A/N: Here's chapter four for everyone out there who has reviewed so far!

**Discussion**

Gojyo followed Hakkai into the small establishment where they were going to spend the night. The red headed kappa shoved his hands nervously into his pockets as the other demon politely asked for two rooms for the night. The girl at the desk kindly agreed and showed them to the rooms.

"Thank you, miss," Hakkai said kindly as he placed his bags on the floor of the room.

"It was no problem, sir," she said, giving Gojyo a flirty glance.

"Yeah, thanks…" Gojyo said distractedly, still staring at the ground.

"I'll leave you two to get settled, unless one of you wants to help me with the firewood?" She asked, still looking suggestively at Gojyo.

Gojyo looked up at her, his face still not paying much attention, "If you come with us to our jeep, we've got a monkey that would be glad to help." he answered in a monotone.

"Oh…that's ok, I can do it by myself." She answered.

"Ok…" Gojyo answered.

Hakkai cut in, slightly worried at his friend's less-than-flirtatious behavior, "At this rate nothing will get done!" he said cheerfully, "Gojyo, I do believe we have an unconscious monk to get up here, if you'll excuse us miss." the demon grabbed his friend and pulled him down to the jeep, leaving the girl standing in the doorway of their room.

When they appeared at their vehicle, they found a half-awake Sanzo and a very worried Goku, "Are you alright, Sanzo?" he was asking quietly.

"Wha..? Yeah, just a goddamn headache, a fucking bad one too." the monk said in a groggy tone.

"It's ok, Hakkai and Go- hey, they're right there!" he said, pointing to the two men.

Hakkai smiled, "I see Sanzo is awake, how do you feel?" he asked.

"I already said I had a fucking headache, Hakkai, you got anything for it?" The monk asked.

Hakkai shook his head, "I'm afraid not, I was just about to go out and buy some more supplies for everyone after we brought you upstairs." he apologized.

The monk let his head fall back to the jeep cushion, "Damn it all." he muttered as he let himself fall back into painless unconsciousness.

Hakkai strode about the small town, checking into various shops and stalls for the many items he had neglected to stock up on for the past few weeks. He sighed happily as he finally found a vendor whose wares happened to be pain-relieving drugs.

The demon purchased the desired objects and with a small smile of thanks to the salesman, he began to walk briskly back to the inn. "Sanzo will certainly be pleased by the aspirin." Hakkai mused quietly, "And Goku should be kept busy by the meat buns I bought for him," he sighed, "That leaves enough time to talk to Gojyo, if I get back to the inn quickly that is…" he picked up his pace at the words left his mouth.

But, luck was not with Hakkai at that moment, in fact, she was on the other side of town helping a certain monkey get lucky with not getting himself killed. Hakkai heard the scream and sighed, "Ah, it seems as if Gojyo will have to wait." he took off at a sprint towards the sound.

He arrived quickly at the scene where a weak demon was terrorizing a clan of humans outside of town. He placed his groceries off to the side and jumped into the fray.

Luckily, the demons were quite weak ones that had not been employed by Kougaji and they just took pleasure in torturing humans. The brown-haired demon quickly took care of the mess with no injury to himself. After destroying them, he seated himself on a nearby stump and began brushing his now dusty clothing off.

A girl ran up to Hakkai, "Thank you, mister, we really needed your help." she said shyly with a blush.

Hakkai grinned at her, "Don't you even think about it, I like helping people, honest." he ruffled her red hair.

The girl smiled brightly and looked up at him with adoring eyes. Hakkai smiled, then did a double take, this young child has red eyes and red hair too, the mark of a hanyou. The demon's smile faltered and the child frowned, "Are you ok, mister?" she asked curiously.

Hakkai shook his head, "Oh, I'm fine, don't worry. I was just wondering where the parents of such a fine young lady would be."

The girl grinned once more, "Oh, my mommy's over here. D'you wanna meet her?" she asked.

Hakkai nodded, "Yes, I would like to meet her very much."

"Ok!" The girl exclaimed, "Follow me!" she grabbed Hakkai's hand and pulled him along.

Hakkai followed willingly, "What might your name be?" he asked as they walked.

The girl stopped and turned, "Me? My name's Kanan!" she resumed tugging Hakkai along.

Hakkai followed as if in a daze now, the girl, she looked the very picture of his Kanan as a child, only with the obvious difference in hair and eye color. She acted as his dead fiancée did too. She couldn't be the reincarnation of his old beloved? As a hanyou? No, Kanan was a wonderful woman, she should have been reincarnated into an easier, better life, unless…

Realization struck Hakkai hard as the learnings of his Christian upbringing rushed back to him, including the seven deadly sins, one of which read, 'Thou shall not kill,' including oneself. Kanan had killed herself…and the child that lay within her. This was her punishment: being reincarnated as a child of taboo His eyes widened as this new revelation his Hakkai hard.

All to soon they had reached the tent where Kanan and her mother apparently lived during their groups travels. Kanan stopped outside the tent and whispered to Hakkai, "Mommy's real sick, so she don't like noise too much." she said before walking quietly into the tent. "Mommy," she said quietly but cheerfully, "I brought a man who wants to meet you."

Hakkai followed her into the dimly lit tent to see a woman lying in a bed, her face covered in shadow. Hakkai watched the covered face turn towards them, "Thank you, Kanan, do you think you could go play with Chi now? Mommy thinks she should talk to this man alone." she said weakly.

Kanan nodded, "Ok, mommy, I'll come back after mister leaves." she bounced out of the tent to find her playmate.

Hakkai watched the woman in bed struggle to sit up so he moved towards her to help her lift herself. He pulled her into a sitting position, then took a seat on the edge of the bed. "Would you like me to light a lantern?" he asked.

"If you wish to," she replied.

Hakkai lifted a lamp and lit it so that a soft light was cast about the tent. The light swept away the shadows enshrouding the woman's face revealing that of a woman in her late middle ages that also bore a striking resemblance to his dead fiancée.

Her face was pale and gaunt, her sickness making her far to thin. She clasped her hands in front of her, "I am Kanna, I assume you wonder about my the nature of my child?" she questioned.

"My name is Hakkai and yes, I do wonder about that, but first, may I ask, what became of your husband?" Hakkai answered.

Kanna smiled, "My husband is out getting wood for the bonfire tonight, he shall be back later on with the wood, along with healing herbs for me. He is indeed a youkai, like yourself, I can see the wonder in your eyes."

"But…how?" he asked in wonder.

"My husband, he is not a normal demon…he was once human." she answered, "But one night…" her voice trailed off.

Hakkai nodded, "I am curious, but you do not have to tell me if you don't wish too."

Kanna brushed a tear from her eye, "No, no, you have something about you, a sadness that seems not to be, yet it lingers in the confines of your aura." her eyes took on a faraway look, "Once, long ago we had a beautiful child, her name was also Kanan. When she was still very young she was stolen from us by slave traders. We thought we had lost her forever, but three years ago we found out that the same child had been taken in by an orphanage."

She glanced at the man next to her and was shocked to see him crying softly, "You…did you know our Kanan? We found the village she lived in with her fiancé, did you know her?"

Hakkai was crying with a pain in his heart that hadn't been there in years, his Kanan…she had had loving parents that cared for her, "I-I knew her," he chocked out, "I was the man she was to be married to."

Kanna gasped, "Oh my, I knew there was something about you, something familiar…" she whispered.

Hakkai quelled his tears, "P-please go on with your story, I want to hear."

Kanna nodded, "We found out where she was living with you, her fiancé, so me and her father were journeying to find her when we heard the news that a young woman had been sacrificed to a local demon tribe and was killed. We knew immediately that it was her. My husband…he went into a murderous rage that his only daughter that he had found after so long was dead. I tried to stop him, but he wouldn't listen. He killed every demon he could find, until he turned into one himself." she stopped for a moment to cough, "After that we heard that her fiancé had killed every single demon involved with the clan that killed her. We knew naught of what befell him, but now I do know."

Hakkai looked at the woman, "I am glad I could satisfy your curiosity, but I still wonder, what happened after that?" he asked curiously.

Kanna looked at him, "Me and my husband were distraught and in pain over losing our baby a second time. Eventually we decided to try for another child, despite the lingering warning of the curse of a taboo child."

"And that child is Kanan…" Hakkai finished.

The woman nodded, "Yes, we could see our first child in our second born, so we named her Kanan in our firstborn's memory. Young Kanan does not know that her namesake is her elder sister, she does not even know that she once had an elder sister."

Hakkai spoke, "So, you see the resemblance too?"

"Yes," Kanna answered.

At that moment a particularly bad fit of coughing overtook her, the fits wracking her small frame. Hakkai quickly moved to support her until she stopped. "Kanna-san," he said, "Allow me to look inside you and find the source of your sickness, I am a healer, I can help you."

Kanna looked at him, gratitude evident upon her features, then an expression of worry overtook the smile, "But," she said, "What about a doctor's fee?"

Hakkai smiled reassuringly at her, "Trust me, I do not wish a fee, I help people as a way to repent and because I want everyone to have an equal chance in living." he explained.

Kanna smiled once more, "Thank you so very, very much, Hakkai-san, I am forever in your debt." she said to him.

"Please, do not worry about it," Hakkai said. Kanna nodded, "If you would please lay down again?" Hakkai asked.

"Of course," the woman said, following Hakkai's order immediately.

Hakkai then kneeled down next to her bed and placed one hand over her forehead, the other over her stomach. He closed his eyes and relaxed, feeling the soft feeling of his healing ki being releasing into the woman's body, checking every square inch of her body for signs of illness.

He was able to pass over her head quickly, seeing no signs of harm there, but gasped in horror at what lay in her chest and stomach. Everything was black, as if an evil entity had planted a seed of darkness in her, but he knew this was not the case.

The healer pulled away, his eyes narrowed "That bad, ne?" Kanna said weakly.

Hakkai sighed, "You are extremely sick," he said, "If I had come any later there would have been no hope, your body would have continued rotting from the inside out at such a pace that no healer would be able to stop."

Kanna's eyes widened in horror, "So it is that bad…" she paused, "But, you can rid me of this damned disease, right?" she asked.

Hakkai smiled reassuringly, "I believe so, Kanna-san, if I infuse you wish some ki, it should keep the infected area contained in one spot. It should also relieve the pain until I can bring the medicine tomorrow."

He knelt once more and pushed his energy into the sick woman's body until his ki was nearly half gone. He stood shakily and moved to leave, "You should be fine until tomorrow afternoon, but I should be bringing the medicine by tomorrow morning, so you'll be fine. Goodbye, Kanna-san." he said cheerfully as he lifted the tent flap.

Kanna suddenly motioned for him to wait, "But, Hakkai-san? How…how did you know of the pain? I have not even told my husband of it." she wondered.

Hakkai's eyes took on a far-away look, "There was an epidemic of this very illness in a little known village in the desert nearly three years back. At the time I was traveling through with a…comrade of mine and he took ill. I did not catch the disease, my ki purified it. However, I was the only healer in the village at the time, so I cured nearly the entire population."

Kanna's mouth opened in surprise, "But, the pain?" she still wanted to know.

"I saw a grown man cry because of that illness, and he was not nearly as infected as your body is. You are a strong woman, Kanna-san, stay that way for Kanan's sake."

Kanna nodded and Hakkai exited the tent, the same far-away look lingering inside his emerald orbs.

Gojyo sat on the full size bed he had claimed as his own in the room he and Hakkai were sharing that night. The brown-haired youkai had not yet returned from the marketplace and Gojyo was beginning to worry. It was already 9 and there was no sign of his friend. Gojyo knew that Hakkai could certainly take care of himself, but often times that led to the repenting youkai overexerting himself.

Gojyo perked up when he heard slightly heavy steps work their way up the creaky wooden stairs and to his room. He was ecstatic when he saw the emerald-eyed youkai stumble his way to his bed, his arms full of groceries.

However, Hakkai seemed not to notice his red-haired hanyou friend as he rummaged sleepily through one of the bags, producing a large white pill bottle, then somehow summoning the energy to go to the bitchy monk's room.

"What the hell…?" Gojyo mused aloud.

His question was answered when he heard the blondie-bitch monk growl at the exhausted youkai, "About damn time, this fucking monkey's only served to irritate me….All. Fucking. Day."

"Maa, maa, Sanzo, I bought you some aspirin and some sleeping pills, I'll leave them here." Gojyo heard Hakkai say, then he listened as his friend poured the monk a glass of water and leave.

This time when Hakkai walked it, he greeted his friend, "Ohayo, Go, and gomen for not returning earlier." he yawned.

Gojyo nodded, acknowledging his friend, "It's alright, Kai, I'm just slightly curious as to what kept you. You said you'd be back around 7, it's 9." he said, pointing at the clock.

Hakkai glanced at the time to confirm what Gojyo had just told him, "Oh my," he said, "I didn't think I had taken that long."

"I know, what kept you?" Gojyo asked again.

"I had to take care of a minor demon problem in a small encampment outside town." Hakkai muttered as he stripped down to his boxers.

"Demons?! Kai, you're going to kill yourself one of these days." Gojyo exclaimed, his eyes lingering on Hakkai's nearly naked form.

Hakkai yawned into the shirt he was pulling over his head, "Iie, it wasn't that. A small girl who lived with them took me to see her mother and her mother was very sick. Most of the time I spent discussing things with her and figuring out the most suitable treatment."

Gojyo narrowed his eyes, "Is she alright?" he asked.

She will be, I'm bringing her an antidote in the morning." Hakkai answered.

Gojyo nodded, "Well, now that you've successfully exhausted herself, you're going to bed." Gojyo ordered.

Hakkai tried to protest, "But I told you I was going to talk to-"

Gojyo cut in, "You need rest, we'll talk tomorrow, I promise."

Hakkai, too tired to protest, yawned and nodded before crawling under his blankets, "Arigato, Go." Hakkai yawned.

Gojyo smiled as he watched Hakkai quickly drop off to sleep, "Goodnight, Kai." he whispered to the sleeping man. He lay down and rolled on his side so he was facing Hakkai, "I think," he murmured, "I think I might just love you." he lay on his back and stared at the ceiling until his eyes, heavy with sleep, closed and bore him off to dreamland.

**A/N:**

Dragid: Squeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOJYO FINALLY ADMITTED HIS FEELINGS TO HAKKAI!!!!!!!…..Ok, so Hakkai was asleep when Gojyo admitted it, but that's ok…

::Ducks angry reviewers at lack of excessive fluff::

Don't' kill me! Please! ::People still continue to throw sharp, heavy objects at Dragid::

No! If you kill me you wont get anymore of this story!

::People stop throwing stuff except for a few dickheads who are too damn thick::

::Dodges remaining items::

Anyway, I actually had quite a hard time with this chapter, something about making the transaction from the market to the nomadic type people on the outskirts of town was kind of hard for me. God knows why, so if the scene change seems a bit choppy, I'm sorry, I really didn't mean it to be so…icky . . Just a little hint here, but remember the reincarnation of Kanan, her little sister, Kanan. She wont play a major role anytime really soon, but mark my words, she will return. And, I case your wondering, little Kanan is almost three years old. Please review, I will LOVE YOU ALL FOREVER!!!!!!! Oh yeah, if you leave an anonymous review, please leave your email so I can send you a message when I update.

Love to all of you who are kind enough to review, Dragid


	5. Realization

A/N: I wrote the first few pages of this in math class once I realized that between Tony, Tommy, John, and Kennedy, things would not get done. I hope you all like this.

ACK! Thank you so much for pointing that out, Shadow-san! I honestly would not have caught that if you hadn't mentioned it, so I once more thank you. The thing is, I write without making a plan beforehand and that's my big problem. I think I can fix this, but only through making Hakkai seem slightly forgetful, when he really isn't. I swear, I will fix it.

Trust

Chapter 5: Realization

The sunlight poured into the room that held Sanzo and Goku. However, this morning the light chose to fall directly onto the irritable houshi. "Ugh…" he grunted and went to move his hand to block out the light. However he found that his hand would not move seeing as how it ws trapped under something rather large, warm and heavy.

"What the hell…?" he grunted as he looked upon a huge mess of spiky brown hair, followed by a tanned face and some drool.

Sanzo twitched. Sanzo glared. Sanzo turned bright red.

"GET THE FUCK OFF ME, YOU DAMNED SARU!"…Sanzo yelled.

The monkey king flew and met the wall. He slid to the ground, flinched, and yawned, "What time is it?" He said sleepily.

The blonde monk twitched again, "Why, may I ask, were you in my bed?" he asked, the anger flowing unbridled into the simple statement.

Goku looked fearfully at his keeper, "I'm sorry, Sanzo. I got cold…" he explained, already moving to cover his head.

As expected, the houshi's paper harisen appeared from nowhere and began a very painful meeting with a messy brown head, "YOU," SMACK, "DAMN," SMACK, "MONKEY!" SMACK! Sanzo yelled irritably, his every word punctuated by a hit.

Goku covered his head, "But, ow, Sanzo, ow." Goku tried to say, "I, ow, didn't, ow, mean, ow, to, ow, make, ow, you, ow, mad, ow." he cried.

Sanzo finally stopped, "Who the fuck told you you could climb in my bed!" The monk continued to yell.

Goku was silent for that question.

At last Sanzo sighed, "You know what? Don't even bother answering, just go eat breakfast of something. Bother Hakkai or Gojyo, not me." He flipped his credit card at the monkey, "If you even think about spending more than you need to, I will kill you…after the sanbutsushin do anyway."

Goku's eyes lit up, "Really! Breakfast! Thank you, Sanzo!" he made to go bound out the door.

"Wait," came Sanzo's voice.

Goku turned around, "Yeah?"

Sanzo put a hand to his forehead, "Go ask Hakkai where the aspirin is," he ordered.

Goku nodded obediently and sprinted out of the room. He burst into Hakkai and Gojyo's room. He found the pair sprawled out in their respective beds, "Hakkai!" he shouted, "Sanzo wants some aspirin!"

Hakkai grumbled something and sat up, "Goku," the demon said tiredly, "I left Sanzo's aspirin in his bed table drawer."

Goku nodded and bounded back to Sanzo's room, "It's in the drawer," he said, almost forgetting to lower his voice.

The monk sent a glare in the genral direction of Hakkai's room and retrieved the medicine from the table, "Go eat," he mumbled to Goku.

Goku's face lit up and Sanzo had to fight to keep a small smile off his face, "Thank you, Sanzo!" he yelled happily and gave the blond haired man a quick hug before blushing and running away.

As soon as he had left Sanzo rolled over and before he fell back to sleep let out a tiny smile.

When Sanzo finally rolled out of bed it was well past noon and well into the afternoon, "Feh," he mumbled as he sat up and felt the pain in his head returning, along with a small crick in his neck from sleeping on it at a different angle. He gently massaged the offending muscle as he sat on the edge of his bed.

He briefly noticed that he wore nothing but a pair of white boxers. He suspected that Goku had probably done so in an effort to make him more comfortable. He groaned as he realized that his head injury would keep them there for at least another day. Despite his longing to leave and continue their western journey, he could see that being hindered in battle by disorientation, possible blackouts, and dizziness could potentially injure someone and hinder their quest even more.

Sanzo stood up a bit to quickly. All to soon the now familiar dizziness was upon him and he sat down trying to quell the impending darkness in his mind, "Damn," he muttered as the blackness faded. This time he stood far slower, making sure he could get his bearings and stand without fainting.

The monk cursed his mortal body. He was weak, although he could easily withstand far more than ordinary humans, his ability to stay conscious through powerful attacks was nothing compared to his youkai companions.

At last he could easily stand and walk around his room. Luckily, his stomach had perfect timing and began to make its hunger known within a minute of the monk's exit of the room. He made his way down the wooden steps to meet with an empty bar. He silently thanked the stupid hag that had forced this cursed quest upon them for once and sat down.

The waiter/bartender appeared from behind the counter and placed a menu before Sanzo. The monk didn't cast it a second glance but instead simply ordered, "Steak. Medium well done. Beer. Cold." he ordered with a groan. His headache was making itself even more well known.

The waiter raised his eyebrow at the grumpy man in front of him, but he shrugged and walked to the kitchen. Sanzo watched the man go through narrowed eyes before letting his head fall onto his arms, briefly wondering why he hadn't bothered to put his robe on, instead being dumb enough to stumble down in a pair of white shorts.  
His purple eyes watched the empty room, perfect, it was nice and quiet. Well it was until he heard them coming. He could hear the dumb monkey at the corner of their street. "Fuck…" he mumbled as the three men burst in.

Goku bounded over to the golden-haired monk immediately, "Sanzo!" he exclaimed, "You're feeling better!"

Sanzo glared at him, "No, I am not, I have a headache and if I had my gun with me I'd shoot you." he growled.

Goku looked at him quizzically, the saw that the monk didn't have enough clothing on to conceal a gun, not even his fan, "Oh." he said. He stopped talking and put his head on his arms, using the position to sneak appreciative looks at his love. Sanzo had quite the body. He had a very toned body and his muscled form was complimented by his pale skin.

He was taken from his Sanzo appreciation activity when Sanzo's food and Hakkai appeared at the same time. Hakkai held a green glass bottle in his hand, "Minna, I'm going out for a bit, I'll be back before dark." he said, "Sanzo, your medicine is in the drawer still." and with that he walked out.

The demon walked the streets of the town until he reached the outskirts where the woman he was bringing medicine to lived. He thought about how he had found her, Kanan's…mother…? "Wait a second," he murmured to himself, "Has it really been so long that I've forgotten? Kanan…my sister…that means that Kanna is my…mother." he said in joy, "My mother!" he yelled, his joyous voice carrying through the village. He stopped, "I have to ask her what happened to me…" his voice trailed off as he began to run towards Kanna's tent.

He stopped short when he saw nearly the entire encampment gathered around the small shelter. He pushed his way to the front, "What happened?" he asked in worriment.

Kanan saw him and ran to hug his leg, "Ha-hakkai-san, m-mommy…she d-d-died la-last night." she sobbed.

Hakkai was struck with horror, "Kanan!" he demanded, "Tell me what happened." he ordered.

The child clung to his leg, "I I I don't know, I went to get some wa-water for her cause she l-looked sick, an an an when I came b-back, she was all white an she wouldn't wake up." she told him through her tears.

Hakkai fell to his knees, staring at the bottle that could have cured her. He looked to the sky which told him it was the late afternoon, "Momma…" he whispered so quietly that no one could hear it.

He saw a middle aged man standing at the entrance to the tent. He saw his daughter talking to Hakkai and walked to them, "Hakkai-sama," he greeted, "My wife told me about you,"

Hakkai nodded, "I I am sorry for your loss." he said.

The man offered his hand to pull the demon up, "Walk with me." he said.

Hakkai accepted and the three, the man, Kanan, and Hakkai began to walk to a different part of the encampment. There they sat on the ground and all three looked at the sky, "I am Tetsuya," he said.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Tetsuya-san, although the circumstances are less than desirable." Hakkai said back.

Tetsuya was silent for a moment, "She told you of our daughter, but she never told you of our son," he said calmly.

Hakkai shook his head.

Tetsuya suddenly shot him a look, "It's you, I know you are my son, Kanna did too, she told me."

Hakkai nodded, "Yes, Kanan…Kanan…" he managed to say.

The older man nodded, "Kanna…she held on long enough, her one wish in life was to find her children, to learn of their fates. When she had found out, she was able to let go." he told the demon.

Kanan sat silently as she watched the man who was her brother, he was…handsome she decided. He would be hers someday, just like he had been her sister's.

The two men embraced, "Tell me of your life." Tetsuya asked.

Hakkai nodded, "Of course, I grew up in an orphanage in a small town. They raised me a Christian and I was a rather…distant child. I never accepted them, I can easily say that I was far too mistrusting and philosophical for one my age. While there I met Kanan." his eyes took on a distant look, "She was so beautiful, I loved her and we were engaged to be married. But then…" his eyes turned dark, "The Yakugen Mou centipede demon tribe stole her from me, so I killed them all, all one thousand of them. So, as retribution for my sins, I was turned into the very thing I hated. I was torn, so I stabbed myself. A man found me and took me in, he is now my best friend," he paused, he did not have the heart to tell his father that he had put Kanan behind him and taken on Gojyo as his new lover.

He cleared his throat and continued, "Now me, Gojyo, and two others travel west on a journey to terminate the plans of some very powerful and ancient demons to resurrect an evil demon that would make a massacre of the human race."

Tetsuya nodded, "I wish you luck," he ran a hand through thick brown locks that Hakkai recognized as being quite similar to his own. He also noted that his emerald eyes came from the woman he had never truly known.

The demon rose, "I must go, maybe I will meet you here during the remainder of my stay here, but now…I can not…I must…" he said, his voice slowly becoming more and more congused.

Tetsuya nodded, "Don't worry, I understand. Be strong kiddo." he chuckled at the expression Hakkai gave him, "Sorry, I just always wanted to say that to you…" his voice trailed off, "Anyway, maybe we'll see you before you leave. Good luck." he said, his words carrying on the wind.

Hakkai smiled, and almost to quick to be seen, he gave the man that was his father a hug, then sprinted away, a smile on his face.

Tetsuya watched as his son hagged him, then ran off to his friends. It felt nice, nice to know that his son was alive and he had protected his sister as long as he could. The man smiled and walked back to the camp to face the others about the strange man with his hair and Kanna's eyes. They would want to hold a large ceremony for the woman he loved, but he would probably sneak off in the dead of night and give her a quiet moonlit burial, one she would have liked.

Hakkai returned to the inn soaked and covered in mud, but with a huge grin on his face. It had started to rain, and he had gotten splattered in mud, but it didn't phase him. Gojyo, who had looked up at him when the door opened, whistled in a low tone, "Damn, you're as dirty as the whores back home, but you look happy as the guy that won the lottery."

Hakkai just continued to grin, "I did, my friend, I did." he said and continued upstairs.

Gojyo, ever the curious one, set down his beer and followed his friend upstairs to their room where he saw Hakkai disappear into the bathroom. He sat down on his bed and waited for his friend. The hanyou could hear his youkai friend toss his muddy clothing to the floor, turn the shower on, then finally the rustling of clothing as the older man dressed.

Hakkai came through the door dressed for bed in a pair of deep green boxers and a black tank-top. He yawned, "Hello, Gojyo, did you need something?" he asked, his mind completely forgetting his situation with the kappa for a few moments.

Gojyo sighed and ran a hand through his hair as he looked at the ceiling, "Man…we need to talk…"

Dragid: Hi all, I know, I'm a dead woman for leaving a semi-cliffy.

Mary: Shauna's not listening and I called Ken stupid

Dragid: I know what you said, just cause I'm writing doesn't mean I'm not paying attention.

Mike: Shauna, I think my family thinks your weird

Dragid: Well I only said 'Come, Zero Alchemist!' to you while she was standing right there

Mary: Yep

Mike: I told my mom to run over you guys the other day

Dragid: Guys, shut up, I'm trying to write an author's note

Mary and Mike: So?

Mary: I need money

Dragid:ignores: well, I needed some stuff for the next chapter to start it with, gotta upload this quick cause I'm supposed to give this to Mary in :checks clock: 2 minutes.

PLEASE REVIEW! 


	6. Revalation

A/N: Guess who's back? Back again? Dragid's back, tell a friend! Whee! Here's chapter 6! Sorry bout the cliffy in chapter 5!

**Disclaimer**: Y'know, I've forgotten this damn thing for the past 5 chapters. I knew I was forgetting something. Anyway, I don't own Saiyuki :cries: but I do own a nice little Saiyuki poster that's on my door.

**Trust**

_**Revelation**_

Hakkai looked at his red headed friend and sighed, "I know, Gojyo, I know…I was just…hoping to maybe postpone this until tomorrow evening. You know, when neither of us were as tired…"

Gojyo sat upright, "Fuck no! Things are getting too fucking weird between us, I can feel it and I know you can too! You're my best friend, and no matter what happens I refuse to lose that, even if we don't end up together!"

Hakkai looked shocked at Gojyo's outburst then sat down next to him, "Gojyo…I don't know how you feel about me…about us being together. You said you were confused, and I understood that, not many are placed in your current position. But after…after Goku's outburst the other day, I don't know. I meant what I said, Go. I love you." he said, his head bowed.

Gojyo watched the older demon and hugged him tight, earning a small gasp from the youkai. When he let go, he frowned when he saw that Hakkai still hung his head. He placed two calloused fingers under his chin and lifted it gently. The kappa pressed his forehead to Hakkai's and whispered, "Don't you ever look that ashamed in front of me again, makes me feel bad, y'know, it's even worse than seeing girls cry."

Hakkai watched those searing crimson eyes as they bore into his own emerald ones. He gasped when the crimson disappeared as Gojyo closed his eyes and pressed his lips to Hakkai's. The hanyou, for once, kept the kiss a chaste one, then pulled away.

"Kai?" he asked.

Hakkai nodded, "Yes, Go?" he answered, his heart soaring and his breath short.

Gojyo turned red, "I…I love you, Kai." he said.

Hakkai grinned madly, "I love you too, Go!" he nearly shouted, then, in an act of joy, jumped on Gojyo and tackled him to the bed.

Gojyo raised an eyebrow, "Damn, man, you're that eager to get me into bed?" he asked teasingly.

Hakkai immediately turned a shade of red to match Gojyo's hair, "Maybe," he teased back.

Gojyo smirked, "Well in that case…" he kissed Hakkai.

The green eyed demon gently pushed him away. He chuckled at the confused expression on the hanyou's face, "It's the middle of the day, Gojyo, what if we're needed?"

Gojyo growled, "Fuck it, Kai, I've wanted you so badly for the longest time,"

Hakkai shook his head firmly, "I can't, Go, not when we're still preoccupied with this journey." he sighed.

Gojyo stared at him, "Why can't the damned thing wait! That stupid monk's still laid up with a head wound and that damned monkey'll get his ass kicked if he comes in!"

Hakkai shook his head, "I want to…no, I _need _ to wait, Go. I love you so much and I want to do this too…but I have, no _we_ have an obligation to others to protect them with no regard for ourselves. Doing this will seal the bond, we'll make foolish mistakes and try to protect each other, which will get one of us killed in the end. We have to protect them, in this leg of our lives, we as people are not the thing that is important." The green-eyes demon stated while looking out the window.

Gojyo watched his best friend look away, "Hakkai…" he sighed, "Don't you get it?"

Hakkai turned to look at his love, "Don't get what?" he asked.

Gojyo pulled Hakkai to his chest and kissed him, "I love you," he whispered in the youkai's ear, "And when love comes into play," he nibbled the rim of Hakkai's ear, "No one," he licked it, "Else," Hakkai felt the kappa's hands travel to his chest, "Matters," he breathed in Hakkai's ear.

Hakkai moaned from the attentions the hanyou was giving him, but finally pushed him away, "No," he said firmly.

Gojyo gave a disgruntled noise before moving away from Hakkai, "If you say so, then I'll stop trying for that." he moved towards the door, "But," he turned to look at the slightly ashamed Hakkai, "I wont stop loving you." he watched Hakkai's shaded eyes, "I'm going for a drink and a smoke, you want to come?"

Hakkai shook his head, but stood up and walked to Gojyo's side, "No, I was thinking a walk would be nicer than a bar."

Gojyo nodded, seeing that his Hakkai wanted to clear his head, "Alright, just promise me that you'll be back before ten?" he asked

Hakkai mumbled a yes before walking briskly though the door and out into the woods.

The hanyou, meanwhile, had taken a seat in the bar, but now, to his surprise, found no urge to drink or gamble as he had originally intended to do. Instead he sighed and sat back in his chair. 'Funny' he thought, 'I don't even want a smoke.'

Hakkai had not gone far from the inn, seeing as how it was already after dark. He estimated it to be about 9:45 now, seeing how it had been eight when he had left. He stood from his seat under the branches of a large willow and began to head back to the inn.

The youkai sighed, sitting out there in the cold had done no good, only thoughts of Gojyo filled his head. Even trivial memories of the kappa had flooded his mind, leaving room for no thoughts other than, 'The people don't matter, just him and I together.'

Unfortunately, Hakkai's rational thought had decided to battle against the matters of his heart and for once in his life, Hakkai threw rationality to the wind and was content to think of his beloved kappa. Now it was nearing the time he had promised to be back by and he knew that it was well past the time to head back. Then again, it was only a five minute walk.

By the time he reached the inn, the clock was just beginning to chime ten so he hurriedly made his way up the stairs, and burst into the room just as the clock struck ten. He expected to find a slightly drunk and worried Gojyo, but instead found his love half under the blankets, a small book which could only be his diary laying across his chest, along with a silver pen he had picked up a long long time ago.

Hakkai smiled faintly and removed the articles from the hanyou's chest and placed them on the table. Was he curious? You ask. The answer was no, Hakkai knew all he needed to know about the red-headed half demon already. Hakkai then stripped down to his boxers and crawled into the bed next to Gojyo. Oddly enough, as soon as he crawled in, Gojyo immediately pulled the shorter man flush against his chest so that Hakkai's back was against his chest.

Hakkai smiled and snuggled closer, "I love you," he whispered.

Just as he was sure that the kappa was sleeping, he heard a tired, "I love you too," from the solid body adjacent to him. Hakkai simply smiled and closed his eyes.

As the hanyou and demon were sleeping, Sanzo lay awake in bed. It wasn't his head, no, his head felt perfectly fine. It was his heart that ailed him on this clear evening. He sighed, staring at the ceiling. Feelings for Goku had stirred in his heart and he knew it. That he could accept. What he could not accept was the fact that he wasn't able to hold them down until a more…manageable time.

He groaned and rolled onto his stomach, hoping to keep the feelings he had locked up in his heart down there for the time being. God damn that stupid saru for affecting him like this. No one had ever been able to make him feel loved since Komyou had died those many years ago.

For once in his relatively short human life, he had begun to let his past leave him. For years it had lingered, bottled up, always haunting him, never letting him have a moments peace. But ever since that kiss in the woods…his heart had ached for more, and that ache had made him able to see that his dwelling on the past was of no matter. He had learned from it, and now, he realized, it was time to let go.

His head was starting to ache, but strangely enough, he didn't wish to quell it. The pain cleared the fog from his thoughts and brought upon him the one thing he had tried to keep away: he was in love with Goku. He loved the little monkey more than his life. But no one else would know that, not for a while at any rate.

He growled, when mad, blame someone else, "God damnit, Kanzeon Bosatsu. Goddess of Mercy my ass."

Then, being effectively pissed off with the world in general, shoved his head under his pillow and neglected the rest of the world the entire night.

If you figure out how much drama was unfolding between the various members of their party, you would obviously assume that something important was happening to Goku. In reality, he was bored out of his mind, although what he would end up doing would worry the others even more so than they had been that day.

For the time being, he was wandering the streets of the town, his hand fingering the golden credit card in his pocket. He grinned, it was a great thing that the three talking heads paid this thing and that Sanzo was headache-y enough for him to grab it. Extra food, here comes Goku.

Goku walked the streets and frowned. All the places smelled so good, but none really caught his fancy. He could see all the delicious looking foods in store windows and food stalls. There were meat buns, dried squid, ramen, miso soup, so many good foods, but for once in his life, that little nagging voice in his head that begged for food just wasn't there today.

He half heartedly bought some squid out of force of habit and took a seat in the local park to nibble away at the food. Half way through the food he tossed the rest to the birds that fluttered around. '_Stupid Sanzo'_ he thought with a sigh, _It's him that's making me feel all funny. I know I love him, but the only reason I feel so weird is because I'm not sure if he loves me back.'_ He sighed again and reclined against the tree, staring up at the darkening sky.

A flock of birds flew by and the monkey king smiled. Being free was a glorious feeling after 500 years in a stone prison. The memories brought a frown after the smile. He wished he knew why he had been locked up there for so long. He must have done something horrible to warrant such a sentence.

Because of Homura he knew that he committed a crime against the heavens and Sanzo, Gojyo, and Hakkai had been involved, but he assumed that they had died unlike him, or they might have suffered the same fate. At least they had all been reunited in the end, probably from the intervention of the 'Goddess of Bitchiness and Trouble' as Sanzo called her.

He giggled at the nickname and rose form his spot. Time to get back before Sanzo noticed his credit card was missing.

As a matter of fact, Sanzo had no idea. As a general rule it was known that Sanzo knew everything you did, whether you knew he did or not. But this time, Goku was able to sneak into their room and slip the plastic card into Sanzo's bag with an almost perverse glee at having gotten away with it. Not that anyone would notice, he had bought a few pieces of squid. They cost hardly any yen.

Seeing as how it was still early and Sanzo would hit him with his fan if he woke him up, he decided to go bother Hakkai and Gojyo. Well, mostly Gojyo, Hakkai never minded.

He bounded down the hall to play with his friends and opened the door carefully, just in case Gojyo had set a trap for him as revenge for the last time. There was no trap, but Goku was puzzled when he heard soft snoring from a bed. There was a big lump, so Goku figured it was Gojyo.

He crept up on the bed and grinned, "BONZAIIIIIIII!" He yelled and jumped onto the lump.

It didn't take longer than two seconds for surprised noises to come out, followed by the feeling of cold, sharp steel against his throat. Gojyo crouched glaring at him while Hakkai was tangled in the blankets on the floor.

"You damned monkey, knock first, baka," Gojyo growled.

Goku looked dumbly at the scene before him. There were two people. There was one lump. Both men had boxers on. Goku made the connection. "Ohhhhh! I get it! Hakkai's back hurt from that demon a couple days ago so you were giving him a back massage!" the monkey said intelligently.

Then he had the gall to look dumbstruck when Gojyo gave him the, 'Wow are you stupid look' and Hakkai giggled.

"What?" he asked innocently.

"N-nothing, Goku, you were right on target," Hakkai managed to answer.

Goku looked slightly pouty, "I think you're lying 'cause you don't wanna play,"

Gojyo grinned his playboy grin, "Oh, we want to play, just not with you," he teased.

Hakkai shot a glare at the kappa, "No we weren't Goku, Go is just being difficult."

"Go?" the youkai questioned.

Hakkai paled, "Ano…slip of the tongue, time to leave Goku!" with that he shoved the younger boy into the hall, slammed the door shut, and locked it.

Goku stood in the hall and pouted for a bit, "You guys are mean!" he called into the room.

His only response was a muffled moan and Gojyo saying, "Oh! So you _do_ like massages?"

Grown-ups could be so mean sometimes.

With that thought he exited the building and took to wandering the town once more. Since he figured that no one would really care too much if he didn't show up for a while, he curled up in the blanches of a large oak tree in the park and fell asleep.

**End of Chapter**

A/N: Ewww, this was mostly a filler chapter, and before I go on, please don't kill me for no sex yet! There will be some soon as my awesomely cool 'Lana-chan knows.

The next chapter will have the boys heading out west again, I think they've dilly-dallied in this town for too long.

**Preview: **

_"Jeez, Sanzo, what could a little old lady do to us?" Gojyo wanted to know._

_"I don't know, but I don't trust her." Sanzo replied, his eyes never leaving the woman._

_The hag stepped forward, "What if," she began, "I could grant your most innermost desire?" _

Is that angst enough for you guys? Believe me, it's gonna be good and long, the chapters revolving around this little old lady known as 'Desire.' The idea for this character is gonna mix it up a little, so please enjoy the next chapters that concern her and the problems she creates, along with the happiness. Heh, I hope I've amply confused you. :Hugs all the confused people:

Ok, I hugged you, now plllleeeeeaaaasssse review! I accept anonymous reviews too, so don't be shy! Oh, and if you aren't signed in or you just aren't a member, leave your email address if you're interested in notification emails, k? Good, now please review, I really want this fic to do well! Feel free to IM me too, my screen name is Dragid909. I love you all! Please review!

I have something to add before I go and post, I got a 69.4 in English this term, which warrants my mother taking away my computer away from now (4/12/05) until the beginning of next school year. End of 4th term if I get an A in English. I'm starting to write chapter 7 today and I'll work on it whenever I can get my computer for my 'themes' and hopefully I'll still be able to update once every month or so.

Dragid

Side thing:

**Five Things I Wonder About Modern Christianity**

1. Why is our newest Pope an ex-Nazi?

2. Why does the Pope ride around in a glass box? I mean, even if he were to be killed, he'd be

he'd be going to heaven anyway.

3. Why do we still believe in God and Jesus? The last time they made themselves known was

over 2,000 years ago.

4. Since the rate of sin has certainly gone up since biblical times, does heaven actually let

_anyone_ in anymore?

5.) Does Hell expand exponentially by the amount of evil souls? Or will it explode when the pressure of all the compressed souls gets to be to much?

Kudos and Thanks to:

_Reina-183 - _w00t! I feel special now, I got a smiley face from you!

_slvrsword - _5 minutes? The whole thing o.O even I can't read that fast…

_krazy-chan - _Heh. The 'talk,' I'm sorry to disappoint you on the outcome, even I was thinking

there was gonna be some lemon, but I killed it. I killed it so freakin bad.

_Lady Meru - _YES! I'm skilled! Fuck yeah! I'm sorry you hate me though --;; although I didn't

do much to help that what with my killing of lemon…

_Koto Juri - _Thank you

_Luthia - _Yeah, my typing errors are pretty damn bad…

_Kari-Ryu no Hime - _:Is very afraid and updates:


	7. Desire

A/N: Hey everyone, I'm back with chapter 7 of Trust. Things are going good and if you're reading this chapter anytime between today (4/12/05) and the beginning of school next year, then I either got my computer back or I snuck on to post just for you.

**Trust**

**Continuation**

Gojyo grumbled something into Hakkai's bare shoulder when he heard a loud knock at their door. Hakkai took the initiative to push himself up on his elbows so he could see the door to some extent. "Come in," he yawned.

The door opened and Sanzo stalked in, "Where the hell is Goku, he never came back last night and we're leaving today," he growled.

Hakkai rubbed his eyes, "How does your head feel?" he asked.

"Fine, now help me look for that monkey. You've had your little fuck-fest, but it's not last night anymore, time to get up and out of this place." With that the grumpy priest stalked out of the room and slammed the door behind him.

Gojyo hauled his body into a sitting position, "He looks and sounds like someone just shoved an icicle up his ass."

Hakkai threw back the covers and got up, "No, that's been there for a while, someone just twisted it around and jammed it up a bit more."

The hanyou chuckled lightly and pulled on his white tank top, "Too true, love, far too true."

It was a lovely, sunny morning on the town. Well, everywhere except the area directly over the head of Genjo Sanzo. First he had woken up (after a very short period of sleep) to find that Goku was still missing. Then he had gone to employ the help of Hakkai and Gojyo in his search for his stupid charge, and found them lying in bed, most likely after a night of fun and sex. Then, on top of all that, his eggs were sunny side up. HOW IN THE SEVEN HELLS DID THEY CONFUSE SCRAMBLED WITH SUNNY SIDE UP!

He vaguely noticed the guy at the table next to him give his scrambled eggs a puzzled look, but he took no notice. Hakkai and Gojyo were coming down the stairs, they looked as if they had just…engaged in a few morning exercises, seeing as how both of them were panting slightly and their hair was mussed.

Sanzo was silent as the two sat next to him and ordered their own and they got the right food. The fact that they could get the right food and he couldn't just grated on his nerves. The door opened and a gust of warm summer air blew in. Goku came in and sat next to Hakkai, "What's for breakfast Hakkai?" he asked as if he hadn't just been missing for the entire night and a good portion of the morning.

Hakkai glanced at Sanzo, who was bright red and shaking, his hands clenched on the table. Hakkai sweat dropped, "We'll get your food to go, Goku." He flagged down a waitress, "Miss, can we have some dried squid, scrambled eggs, toast, and some white rice to go? All in extra large portions, please."

The waitress nodded and yelled the order to the cook, who finished the meal in a very short amount of time. Hakkai gathered the food and ushered the group outside to the jeep, where their bags were already waiting.

Gojyo noticed Sanzo, who was chain smoking at and alarming rate, "So, bouzo, what got your panties in a twist today?" he asked.

Sanzo gave no warning, suddenly Gojyo was missing a nice chunk of hair from the side of his head and his bandanna had taken an unexpected trip to the ground.

Gojyo froze, then instead of saying something, quietly jumped into the back of the truck and grabbed a beer. Hakkai and Goku gaped at Sanzo's actions, then quietly followed suit and got in the jeep without any noise. Sanzo then opened his door and sat in his seat and lit a cigarette.

The other three glanced silently at the houshi, then at each other with slight fear, "DRIVE, DAMN IT!" Sanzo yelled. His companions all jumped, and the jeep shuddered. Then they were off.

After a few hours of complete silence, Sanzo seemed to have calmed down and worked himself into a really deep sleep, or a very deep meditation. Gojyo sighed, "Damn, that baka was fucking pissed this morning. Thanks Goku."

Goku glared at the hanyou, "It wasn't my fault no one wanted me around, so I went outside for the night. Maybe if you and Hakkai had decided to talk to me instead of snuggling this never would have happened," he retorted.

Gojyo snorted, "My fault? You were rooming with Sanzo last night, he was supposed to entertain your tiny brain."

No one had really noticed, but Hakkai had begun to turn bright red, "Maa maa," he mumbled, "Calm down, you two. Sanzo is not in a good mood today and I suggest you put off your fighting until tomorrow."

The two in the backseat glared at each other again, then at the back of Sanzo's head, then slumped down in their seats, "You're no fun, Hakkai," Goku muttered.

Gojyo grinned, "On the contrary, Goku dear, Hakkai here is very fun."

Now Hakkai resembled a ripe tomato on fire, "Go…" he mumbled.

The kappa just grinned and leaned forward to whisper in the youkai's ear, "You're beautiful when you blush." He made sure to blow softly on the shell of Hakkai's ear.

Hakkai shuddered, "Not now, Gojyo," he whispered back.

By now Goku was looking disgusted and trying not to stare at the couple, '_That is so gross_,' he thought. Then, '_I kinda wish that was me and Sanzo…' _Now Goku was turning red, one could only wonder.

Suddenly the jeep screeched to a halt, throwing the four men out and over the windshield and into the dirt. This did not help Sanzo's mood, especially since he had finally been getting some sleep, "KAMI-SAMA DAMN IT!" He yelled, rubbing his now sore ass.

Hakurryu had transformed back dragon form and was floating about Hakkai's left shoulder. Hakkai groaned and rubbed his shoulder which he was sure was sprained, "Why did you stop, little one?" he asked.

The dragon chirped and waved it's tail towards and old hag who was standing in their path, "Oh…" Hakkai muttered, then stood up, "Hello, ma'am, what brings you to these parts with no protection?" he asked.

The woman frowned, "I am quite sorry, I live nearby and was out searching for herbs and I seem to have hobbled in your path."

By this time the other three men had picked themselves up and Gojyo was about to start yelling, so Hakkai sent a quick silencing spell over his shoulder at the hanyou. Sanzo stood next to Hakkai and began to speak, "We're traveling west to stop the cause of the problems we have been having with the youkai population as of late. Have you seen anything odd around here?" he asked.

The hag shook her head, "Iie, the area around here has been void of youkai for many years," she informed them.

Hakkai frowned, something wasn't quite right about this woman. Goku butted in, "Hey, do you have any food? I'm starving!" the golden-eyed boy bounced up and down.

The woman laughed, "Hai, I have some food with me, but I am not heading back to my humble home quite yet, I have yet to find the plants I set out for."

"We'll help!" Goku exclaimed, eager for a meal.

Sanzo glared, Hakkai sighed, and Gojyo screamed silently from his position behind Hakkai. The hag nodded, "Very well," she turned, "Young one, do you know what poison oak looks like?" she asked.

Goku nodded, "Yeah…" his voice trailed off. He knew poison oak, alright, he had known to be wary of it ever since those stupid monks had told him it was safe to eat, he had been sick for weeks.

The hag nodded, "Very good, take these gloves and this bag, I would like you to find me some and fill the bag as much as you can," she handed a pair of heavy gloves from her rag-like attire and a small burlap bag.

Next she turned to Hakkai, "You look like an intelligent young man, could you find me some foxglove, parsnip, basil, and parsley?" Hakkai nodded and she handed him a few bags similar to the one she had given to Goku.

Sanzo was next in line, "I trust you can find some oak leaves without grumbling?" Sanzo grunted and took the bag shoved in his direction and stalked off, leaving the other three who hadn't begun to leave yet.

Hakkai shooed Goku off into the forest to collect the poison oak and stood by Gojyo, who still looked pretty pissed off. The hag glanced at Gojyo, "You can help him, he has much to do," with that she turned off and went her own way to search for whatever remained on her list of needs.

Hakkai removed the silencing spell from his love and grinned, "You deserved it, Go."

Gojyo glared at the youkai in front of him, "My ass, you just wanted to be annoying," he retorted.

The brown headed youkai grinned, the quickly reached down and pinched Gojyo's behind. Gojyo squeaked and ran after Hakkai, "You're mean, you know."

Hakkai smiled again, "I know, Go, I know."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: Blah, that was an icky chapter, I'm not happy with it at all, but it has to do, I promise a longer chapter next, I swear. These past couple chapters have served as stupid fillers that serve no other purpose than to fill the time in-between the exciting shit. I prose, next chapter everything'll get going. Next we get to find out who this hag is and what she means to do.


	8. Spellbound

A/N: Alright, I am back with the 8th installment of Trust. Have fun, not much fluff, but now we _know _ that Sanzo dear likes Goku!

**Trust**

_**Chapter 8: Spellbound**_

The Sanzo-ikkou soon met up with the crone in the clearing in which they had met, all five carrying bulging bags of plants. The men set them down in front of the woman, "There," Sanzo grumbled, "We gathered your plants, now feed the monkey and let us go. Better yet, we'll just go."

He turned to leave, "Stop yourself right there, sonny," the crone said.

The preist turned, "And why should I?"

She grinned, "Because I can grant your deepest desire."

Sanzo paused, then snorted, "Like hell."

Hakkai reached out to Sanzo, "She's an old woman," he whispered, "Humor her."

Sanzo growled, "Fine." He turned to the woman, "You have five minutes. Go."

She laughed, "First off, my name is Desire."

Gojyo leaned over to Hakkai, "I sure don't," he whispered. Hakkai began to giggle.

She continued, "I can grant any wish, fulfill any desire. The wish-magic in me is very strong. Come here, sir youkai." She beckoned to Hakkai.

Hakkai stepped forward, "Yes, madam?"

She chuckled, "You wish for _her_, don't you? Your lost lover. Yet…there is another you wish for too, that half-breed there."

Hakkai laughed nervously, "No, you're wrong, she is gone and he is not. He is who I want, no longer her."

Desire cackled, "Your heart says otherwise, you long for her body, you miss those innocent touches of hers, don't you?"

Hakkai looked down, "I long for her because I could not save her. I could not save her from her undeserving fate, I never said goodbye."

The crone looked at him and frowned, "You lie, now come forth young demon of the earth."

Goku looked at Sanzo, who raised an eyebrow at him. Goku went up to her, "I do not desire anything." he raised his chin at her.

"Ah, young one, you lie to not only yourself, but your companions as well. I know what you want. That priest, he captivates your heart, as does the golden one of your dreams. You also desire the lost memories of your past. I can give them all back, young one."

Goku stumbled back, "No you can't…those things…I need to get them myself. Not through someone else."

She chuckled, "But dearest demon, I can do it, I have the power."

"I c-c-can't." Goku stuttered before retreating near Hakkai.

The crone sighed, "You, blondie, your turn."

Sanzo glared at her, but moved anyway, "What do you see in my desires? Wait, no, I'll tell you. I want the monkey, I want Komyouu Sanzo alive and well. Anything else you'd like to spill to my wonderful companions?"

Desire raised an eyebrow, "Very well, priest, it seems as though you are very in tune with your heart. Now for you, half-breed."

Sanzo sat next to Goku, a smug expression on his face, "Wipe the smirk off, blondie!" Desire yelled. He glared.

She turned to Gojyo, "And we come to the half breed, one wanted by no one, feared and loathed by everyone. You, my dear, want acceptance. You wish for a loving mother, a brother and father who played important roles in your life. The life of a normal person of pure blood, demon or human."

Gojyo shook his head, "Yes, I do want that, but I crave this life more."

Desire narrowed her eyes, "Suit yourselves, I see my services go unwanted."

She turned and began to walk away, "Wait," called a voice. The group was surprised when Goku rose from his seat, "I want what you offer, I need to know of my life before this. Please, give it to me."

Desire grinned and before the eyes of the Sanzo-ikkou, she seemed to transform. Black and blue light surrounded her. Wrinkles disappeared, skin turned younger, fingers elongated, breasts rose and teeth grew white. This continued until a young woman was standing before them. She was tall for a woman, about 5'8" and had blue skin and piercing silver eyes. She grinned almost sadistically, "So mote it be!" she cried and a light flashed.

When they could see again, Goku was collapsed against a log in the clearing. Sanzo's famous rage broke out ten-fold, "WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM!" He screamed, drawing his gun.

She laughed, "I gave him what he truly…desired," she whispered the last word.

Sanzo clicked the safety off, "Bitch," he snarled, "Where is he." he demanded.

Desire looked at him, "I'll show you." she said softly. The smile came again as did the light.

Hakkai and Gojyo saw Sanzo's form next to Goku's, holding on to him as if for dear life. Gojyo summoned his sickle, "Don't you dare pull that shit with me you whore, I'll fuck you up." he sent the weapon flying at her. She neatly dodged it and raised her hand to summon that light again. Gojyo jumped away from the center, but it grazed him.

When he landed, he stumbled and fell to one knee. Hakkai rushed to support him and Gojyo immediately fell against his friend, "Kai…I feel…tired, I want to sleep now." he mumbled into Hakkai's chest.

Hakkai shook him, "No! We don't know what will happen! Look at Sanzo and Goku!"

Gojyo shook his head, "They aren't hurt…they're just…remembering. It's nice, I want to…follow…" Gojyo's voice trailed off as he went limp.

Hakkai lay him down, where he proceeded to make sure Gojyo was still alive. Thank the gods, he was. His pulse was steady, but he did not appear to be…there. Hakkai stood, fury burning in his eyes, "How dare you take them! They are not yours to steal!" He sent a ki blast at the now laughing woman.

"You think you can best me, human turned demon? I think not, I am older than the oldest demon! I am a base of your emotion! I am desire! It lives in all of you, and I control all! YOU. CAN. NOT. WIN!" She threw the blast back at Hakkai, sending him slamming into a tree. He slumped down, blood trickling from a shallow gash on his shoulder.

Desire cackled and with a last raise of her hand, the last of the Sanzo-ikkou was sent whirling into the past.

A/N: Ok, I know this is short, but believe me, it gets better. The next 4 chapters will each focus on each member. They're all in different illusions, but eventually they'll start to intertwine with each other. I actually haven't decided whether to make four long chapters, or eight shorter chapters. Eight shorter ones would be easier, so I just might do that.

I've also decided that before I post a chapter I'll have the following one written. That way, should I get writer's block and have a hard time thinking, I'll have a back up for everyone. So yes, when this is posted I'll have chapter nine done. However, if _anyone_ nags me about posting in since it's done, then it shall be an extra week before I post. See? You complain, you fuck everyone over. I post when I'm good and ready, and those naggers out there aren't going to change that.

Now, because I love you, I'm going to start on Chapter 9.


	9. Trapped pt 1

A/N: And here's chapter 9. Talk of nothing shall be held after the chapter.

**Trust**

_**Chapter 9: Trapped pt. 1**_

Gojyo groaned in exhaustion and ran his fingers through his hair. He could hear muted voices talking somewhere near him. They sounded so familiar, but he couldn't place them, not now anyway. "The hell…?" he muttered and opened his eyes.

The sight he saw around him made him freeze with shock. This…this was his old home. Before Hakkai, before his days as a gambler, this was home. '_Mother…_' he thought.

It wasn't long, barely a minute before a group of people walked through the door to his room. He sat up wearily and nearly fell back down in shock. His mother was holding hands with a man that was oh so familiar…his father. Even more different and odd was his brother talking easily with Hakkai. _Hakkai_ of all people.

He sat up straight, "M-mother? Father? Dou? Hakkai!" he said in utter shock.

His family plus Hakkai looked at his strangely, "Go, what on earth are you talking about? You sound so surprised to see us." Hakkai laughed, "I can see you being in shock at being out so long, but seeing us?"

Gojyo shook his locks of hair out, "How long was I out?" he asked.

This time his mother spoke. She sat down on his bed and hugged him, "A whole week, your father and I were so worried. I love you so much, I was so afraid I'd lose you."

Gojyo stiffened at the comfort his mother was giving him, "M-mother?" he said strangely, but this feeling he was getting. He felt so loved. He put his arms around her and for the first time in a very long time, he cried.

His mother pulled away to look at him, "Darling, why are you crying? If anything, we should be crying from happiness. We thought you were fatally wounded!"

Gojyo wiped the tears, something was wrong…why was he here? It didn't feel right, but he played along, "I'm sorry, mother, what happened?" he asked, better find out about this condition of his.

Hakkai sat on his bed and held his hand, "A little boy from town, you know, the half-breed one, some of the older boys were making fun of him. He ran into the street and was nearly trampled by a horse that was spooked by his running in front of it. You were there and you dove into him, pushing him out of the way. Unfortunately, you were trampled instead." He hugged Gojyo in obvious relief.

His father nodded, "Hakkai's right! But it's that demon blood in you that kept you alive!"

Gojyo looked at them as if they had told him unicorns were taking over the world, "I can't quite out my finger on it…but you all seem different…" he wondered aloud, "May I see a mirror?"

Dou grabbed one from the table and tossed in to him. Gojyo caught it and noticed two silver rings on his pointer finger. '_Power limiters…then…?'_ He looked in the mirror. Purple hair, black eyes were what looked back at him. He knew he looked normal to them, but for some reason, it didn't look right to him…it didn't feel quite right.

His dad patted his purple hair, "Atta boy! Now that you're up you can help me and Dou rebuild Saki-san's house in town!"

Gojyo looked up, "Huh? What happened?" he asked. He remembered Saki-chan, she had watched him often when he was young.

His brother grinned and pretended to fall over with worry, "Mother dear! Call the doc, those hooves erased his memory!"

His mother chuckled, "No need, he's on the way for a check-up," she turned towards the kitchen, "Besides, you were crying with worry when you carried him back. Now shoo, the doctor's here."

Dou slunk out of the room, a sulky look on his face, their father and Hakkai followed with grins His mother returned and sat by him on the bed. She smiled and ran her fingers through his hair, "Oh Gojyo," she sighed, "I thought I was going to lose you, but what you did was a wonderful thing. Not many people would risk themselves for a half breed."

Gojyo sat back, "If I hadn't helped him who would've?" he asked.

His mother sighed, "No one, that's the sad part. I know anyone of our family would have, but no one else in the village will ever do that. Everyone likes Chiyo, she's a very sweet girl. Her child is only tolerated because of the town's love for her."

She stood, Hakkai dear, you can come in, I'm leaving now." She called before walking out of the room.

Hakkai entered from the other door and as soon as the door Ayumi had left through clicked, he all but ran to Gojyo and swept him into a mind numbing kiss. Gojyo's eyes widened slightly before closing and returning the kiss with a passion that matched Hakkai's.

When they pulled away they were both panting. Hakkai climbed in the bed beside Gojyo and hugged him, "I love you so much, Go, don't you ever pull that stunt again, alright?" He buried his head in Gojyo's chest.

Gojyo put his arms around Hakkai, pulling him closer. His mind was racing though, _'I love him in my arms like this, it feels wonderful, but not entirely right. Hell, this day doesn't feel entirely right.'_ Instead of voicing his concerns to his boyfriend, he simply relaxed and held his emerald eyed demon in his arms and they slept.

_He was fighting demons. H wasn't sure why, he just knew that he absolutely had to kill them. He whirled, kicked, and swung his sickle at the oncoming demons, killing them easily. He saw Hakkai being surrounded, but before he could move in, his lover dispensed of them with a well aimed ki blast._

_He spun around, his red hair flying in his face. The monk was alright, and monkey boy was holding his own. He smirked. Time to kick some demonic ass. The rest of them were easily gotten rid of and as a reward he made the monkey get him a beer. It took bickering and effort, but it worked. It always did._

_Soon the four were off, Gojyo and Goku in back, Hakkai driving, and Sanzo up front. The monkey was making lovesick puppy eyes at the back of Sanzo's head, so Gojyo, never one to miss an opportunity, chucked his empty can at the monkey's head. Perfect hit._

_"OW! HEY! What did ya do that for!" Goku yelled rubbing his head._

_Gojyo chuckled, "Stupid monkey, can't even dodge a can."_

_Goku glowered, "Oh yeah! I killed 53 of those damn demons back there! I'll bet you couldn't even get one!"_

_Goku put up his fingers in the victory sign and smirked, "67," he said._

_"Liar!"_

_"Who're you calling a liar, you stupid monkey!"_

_"I'm not a monkey!"_

_"You're right, you're a monkey who can't count!"_

_"WHAT!"_

_"You heard me."_

_BANG!_

_Goku and Gojyo cowered in their seats. Sanzo shot his gun again, "One more sound from either of you and you're dead. Got it?" A vein was twitching quite noticeably in his forehead._

_Gojyo grumbled, "Jeez, you're such a tight ass," and grabbed another beer._

_Gojyo suddenly found himself headband less. And his beer shooting out the side of the can and into the forest, "Betcha he's got PMS," he muttered to Goku. Goku giggled._

_"I said SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Sanzo screamed at the two._

_Needless to say, Gojyo and Goku shut their mouths._

_For the next hour, the only sounds were Goku's snoring while he napped, and the occasional drag from a cigarette and fwoosh sound of a beer opening._

_Night began to fall and Hakkai pulled over in a small clearing. Gojyo hopped out, as did Sanzo and Hakkai. Goku was still snoozing in the backseat., so he was left where he lie. _

_The half demon began to walk off into the woods, "Help me with wood, Kai?"_

_Hakkai rose from his seat and walked to where Gojyo was waiting. The two walked into the forest with each other, talking about trivial things, Gojyo badmouthing Sanzo and Hakkai defending the rude monk.. _

_Eventually they came to a large oak in the middle of the woods. Hakkai began to pick up several dried branches that had fallen from it's many limbs. He heard Gojyo walking up behind him, but paid no attention to him until he felt himself straighten up and pulled into two strong arms._

_"Go…?" He questioned._

_Gojyo buried his face in the crook of Hakkai's neck, "Kai, something's wrong and I don't know what," he muttered._

_Hakkai leaned back, "Did I do something?" he asked softly, "You know I need a little more time, I'm sorry."_

_Gojyo shook his head, "No…not you, never you. Just…something feels off." He spun Hakkai around and kissed him on the cheek, "You know what? Never mind, I'm just paranoid is all." He hugged his love close._

_Hakkai wrapped his arms around Gojyo, "I don't know, you're suspicions tend to be right."_

_Gojyo shook his head, "Nah, I'm getting an overactive imagination, that damn monkey's rubbing off on me."_

_Hakkai laughed and wriggled away, "Very funny, now let's get to collecting wood, Sanzo will wonder what we're up to." he turned and bent over to grab a branch._

_Gojyo watched Hakkai's ass for a moment before sighing and collecting wood of his own._

_By the time they returned, night had nearly fallen and Sanzo and Goku had apparently gotten into some kind of fight; Sanzo was sitting in the jeep while Goku sulked by a tree. Hakkai cheerfully dropped the wood on the grass, "Goku! What happened?" he asked._

_"Sanzo's mean. He hit me with his fan." Goku muttered._

_Hakkai smiled, "I'm sure he doesn't mean it!"_

_Goku looked at Hakkai, "He hit me 10 times! Ow…." _

_Hakkai grinned and moved away._

_Meanwhile Gojyo was talking to Sanzo, "So, Sanzo, what'd the monkey do this time?"_

_Sanzo glared at him, "He talked. In fact, that sounds an awful lot like what you're doing right now."_

_Gojyo raised an eyebrow, "No need to wedge that stick in your ass in there even more," he said jokingly._

_Sanzo's gun was out in a flash, "Unless you wish to die, I suggest you either go away or find me some headache medicine."_

_"Fine, fine, I'm leaving!" Gojyo exclaimed, backing off, "Bastard…" he muttered._

_It was night now and everyone was getting ready for bed. Gojyo set up a blanket on the ground with another on top of it. He burrowed in between them and sighed. Nice and warm, just how he liked it. The camp was silent except for the sound of crickets. Suddenly, Gojyo picked up the sound of chattering teeth, "Kai?" he asked._

_"W-what?" came the stuttered reply._

_"You cold?" he said back._

_"N-no, I'm fine, Go."_

_Gojyo sighed, "You're a horrible actor today, Kai," he said._

_He gathered his blankets and stood up. He walked to where Hakkai was burrowed in a thin sheet, "No wonder you're cold! You're gonna kill yourself!" Gojyo exclaimed. He lay down next to Hakkai and spread all three covers over both of them. Gojyo then pulled the shivering Hakkai to his chest and snuggled against him._

_"Hakkai wiggled his body as close to Gojyo's as he could, "Thank you, Go," he whispered._

_Gojyo sighed, "You're impossible, you know that?"_

_Hakkai nodded sheepishly._

_The half-breed held him tighter, "And Gods do I love you for it."_

Gojyo sat up with a start, rudely throwing the sleeping Hakkai from his resting spot on Gojyo's chest. Hakkai sat up sleepily, "Go…what's wrong?"

Gojyo looked around wildly for a moment before laying back down, "I don't know…I had a dream, but I can't remember much. You were there, so was this kid…I think his name was Goku. There was blonde guy too, a priest I think. I can't remember his name. Maybe Sage. I dunno."

Hakkai held the frazzled demon for a moment, "Well, it was just a dream, right? No harm done." he yawned, "Now, you are my patient, and due to your recent comatose state, I order staying in bed with your boyfriend for the rest of the day."

Gojyo grinned, "You'll never change, will you, Kai?"

The demon smiled back, "I certainly hope not, dearest, I certainly hope not."

Gojyo sighed happily, "You better now, 'cause you're my bitch." he smacked Hakkai lightly with a pillow.

"Oh ho ho, now I'm _your_ bitch?" Hakkai questioned, an eyebrow raised, "Last time I checked you did anything I say." he hit Gojyo back.

"Really now? Hey! Stop looking at me like that!" he exclaimed.

"I'll look at you however I want to!" Hakkai pounced on his patient and kissed him hard.

Gojyo gave up the struggle with his limbs and continued with his tongue. The two men battled for control, each putting up an excellent fight. A sudden noise came from the doorway. Without bothering to detach from each other, they glanced over to see Dou standing there, a slightly disturbed image on his face.

"Dear Gods, I did not need to see that," he groaned.

Hakkai had the sense to remove his mouth first. He looked innocently at Dou, "Doctor's orders!" he exclaimed cheerfully.

Dou looked at the two skeptically, "That, I doubt. No sane doctor would prescribe vicious attacks on the mouth for a post-comatose demon."

Gojyo sat up, "Well, I think dear Dr. Hakkai's medicine is working quite well. In fact, I think I'll go back to sleep, that's how re-energized I'm feeling."

Dou sighed and left the room.

Hakkai grinned down at his lover, "So, shall we pick up where we left off?"

Gojyo shook his head, "Nah, I wasn't lying, I'm still pretty tired. I need sleep."

Hakkai nodded, "I'm sorry, I should have known." He hung his head in shame.

Gojyo didn't say anything, for some reason seeing Hakkai in that position looked oddly familiar. Much more…normal that this aggressive Hakkai he loved. Whatever he was feeling, albeit normal, he still felt bad he had caused that reaction from his lover, "Hey, it's not your fault, I was into it as much as you.. It's not your fault, kay, babe?"

Hakkai nodded, but didn't look up.

The purple haired demon grasped his chin, "Yo, when I say it's not your fault, you accept that, got it?" he lifted Hakkai's face for a kiss, "I love you."

Hakkai smiled, "I love you, now let's get you some rest, I'm still kind of sleepy too."

Gojyo lay down and held Hakkai against his chest once more. He frowned as he drifted off, something wasn't right and damned if he wasn't going to find out.

Thankfully he slept in peace and when he woke once more, it was not from sitting straight up in a rush, rather, he was on his side, spooning with his dearest Hakkai. He opened his obsidian eyes slowly and inhaled the scent of the smaller demon, "Beautiful," he whispered into Hakkai's hair.

Hakkai continued to sleep, so Gojyo rolled over and got up quietly, he had just realized how full his bladder was. As he walked to the bathroom (for a moment he forgot where it was) he reveled in his life. He had everything he could ever, and would ever, want. Hakkai was here, with him, as were his mother, father, and older brother. Life was good.

He pulled his pajamas back up and stealthily walked back to his room. Hakkai was still sleeping peacefully and Gojyo watched him for a moment. A weird thought came to him, _'I can't believe how peaceful he looks. Heh, that seems to be happening more and more often…good.'_ He frowned at the thought, there was nothing that would cause Hakkai to lose sleep over. Hakkai had held a wonderful childhood with his adopted parents in the next village over. '_Weird…'_ he though, then shrugged it off and climbed into bed.

He tried to sleep again, but he couldn't. His eyes wouldn't stay shut and his breathing refused to even out. He was pissed. He didn't know _why_ he couldn't get to sleep. He had only been up for a minute, and the effects of sleep were still hanging on him, so why in the seven hells couldn't he sleep!

He sighed and got out of bed. The sun was beginning to rise and he wanted to go watch it. He tucked this long purple hair (why was that so odd sounding to him?) behind his ears and headed outside.

The pinks, yellows, and purples were in the early stages, so for the time being Gojyo sat on the porch steps. He listened with his demonic hearing as the neighbors began to rise and get ready to go into town before the morning rush and he smiled. This was perfect, nothing strange in this town, nothing to worry about in the world. Hell, not even that weirdo dream could bug him, it was just entirely too peaceful.

As time passed he saw two figures, one tall and one tiny, walk up over the hill. The sun was directly behind them, so they were only silhouettes to Gojyo. However, he could hear a child laughing and guessed that it was one of the mothers taking her child to visit someone.

He watched them draw closer and was vaguely surprised when they turned to his home. Now that they weren't backed by the sun, Gojyo could see Chiyo and her apart child who he really had no memory of. The child was running around his mother and in every which direction, but all she did was smile and talk to him kindly. No scolding, he knew Chiyo was a kind hearted girl.

They approached the porch and Chiyo smiled, "Oh, Gojyo-san! I was hoping you would be up, you've always been an early riser."

Gojyo ran his fingers through his hair, "I suppose I have been. Is there anything you need? I'd be glad to help."

Chiyo's eyes widened and she bowed her head, "Oh no! I came to thank you for saving my baby's life! He means so much to me…" she watched him as he chased after a cricket in the front yard, "I don't know what I would have done if he had been killed."

Gojyo shook his head, "I don't need thanks, I'm just happy to see him running around."

The woman looked up, he eyes were glittering with tears, "Oh Gojyo-san! Thank you so much! He's the only reminder I have of his father! I miss Goku so much! I wish he would come home, he's been in Shangri-La for so long now. I know he wants to make money so we can all live in comfort, but I can't help but miss him. Thank the Gods for you, Gojyo-san."

Gojyo smiled sheepishly, "It was no problem, anyone would've done the same."

Chiyo shook her head, "No they wouldn't have. Maybe Dou or Hakkai, but no one else. They don't like him because he's a half demon, half human child. He's just like any other boy, the only difference are his red hair and eyes. I love him, I want to give him a good life…but…but I can't. He will always be made fun of, I can only tell him to be strong.

Gojyo's eyes widened, for some reason, he couldn't fathom why, those words…they triggered something. A defiance to the world? And why on earth did Shangri-La seem to have more importance to him that any other city? God damn was life confusing now.

He nodded, "He's a good kid, he'll grow up to be a good adult."

Chiyo smiled, "Thank you, Gojyo-san," she turned to where her child was playing, "Honey! Come over here, please!"

The child bounded over, his hands cupped and a radiant grin on his face, "Mommy! Look what I did!" he opened his hands to reveal the butterfly, which promptly flew away. He frowned, "I'm sorry, mommy, he flew away."

She smiled and hugged him, "Hajime, say thank you to Gojyo-san, remember him? He saved you last week."

Hajime looked at Gojyo, "Thank you Gojyo-san!" He said happily, then squirmed out of his mother's arms to look for his escaped butterfly.

Chiyo smiled, "Thank you once again, Gojyo-san, Hajime and I will be on our way now. Hajime!" She called, directing her last word at her son.

Hajime, knowing that they were leaving, ran ahead of his mother.

Chiyo turned to leave when Gojyo said something, "If you meet the Buddha, kill the Buddha. If you meet your father, kill your father. Attached to nothing, bound by nothing, live life for the sake of life itself."

The human turned, a questioning look on her face, "Where did you hear that?"

A flash of that blonde guy in his dream came into his head, "I…I don't know…" he said, more to himself than her.

Chiyo gave him a last glance before following her song over the hill and back to town.

Gojyo leaned back against the porch just as Hakkai exited the house, rubbing his eyes, "G'morning Go, why're you out here so early?"

Gojyo shrugged, "I dunno, felt like it I suppose."

Hakkai sat next to him and leaned against him sleepily.

Gojyo spoke, "Hey Kai? Do you know any blonde monks?"

Hakkai shook his head, "No, not personally, but I do know one of the Sanzo's that lives at the temple in Chang'An has blonde hair, the other brown."

Gojyo looked down at him, "And how on earth do you know that?"

Hakkai turned red, "Um…no reason?"

Gojyo raised an eyebrow, "Tell me."

Hakkai sat up, his face bright red, "Alright, so I _do_ know him personally. He's a sarcastic guy, we had a fling some years before I met you. I did use to live in Chang

'An. We haven't talked much over the years, but I suppose if you want to meet him I could contact him again."

Gojyo grinned, "I see how it is, he's a hottie, isn't he!"

Hakkai jumped back, "No! Not at all! I mean, uh…you tow wouldn't get along very well! That's it!"

Gojyo hugged him, "Of course, Kai."

They sat back in silence until Gojyo's mind was plagued again, "Kai? Did your blonde monk friend ever used to preach shit? Like earlier this proverb-type thing popped into my head."

Hakkai frowned, "Was it something like… 'If you meet the Buddha, kill him' or something like that?"

Gojyo nodded, "Yeah, it went 'If you meet the Buddha, kill the Buddha. If you meet your father, kill your father. Attached to nothing, bound by nothing, live life for the sake of life itself.'"

"That's it…Go? What's going on? Until you woke up from your coma, you had no idea that there was even a temple in Chang'An. You've been acting different."

"Honestly Kai, I have no idea what the hell's wrong with me. All I know is that I need to figure it out and I need you to help me by contacting Sanzo. He's important to something, I just don't know what."

The brown haired demon nodded, "I'll go write a letter now." he got up and went in the house.

Gojyo looked at the sky, the sunrise was almost over. Another sun, another start. Time to find coffee.

A/N: Yeah! We're finally in the beginning stages of the climax! Yes folks, you hard it straight from the author, another few chapters and this is half-over! Kinda depressing isn't it? On the bright side, the amount of reviews from this have surpassed those of my stupid Harry Potter fic that I wont be working on anytime soon. I love this story, I have so much fun writing it. I don't know how many chapters there'll be exactly, but I'd like to estimate another 6-10. Next we'll be moving to Hakkai's chapter, Trapped pt. 2. (P.S. Guess who gets a lemon!)

**Hakkai**: What if I want to be pt. 4? Like the big finish?

**Dragid**: No.

**Hakkai**: Whyyyy?

**Dragid**: Because you're next, dammit!

**Hakkai**::pouts: Who gets part 4 then?

**Dragid**: I dunno, Goku or Sanzo, haven't decided yet

**Hakkai**: But _I_ wanna be part 4! I'm better than them!

**Sanzo**: Hakkai. I've never had a problem with you before, but if you think I am beneath you, I'll have to kill you. :cocks gun:

**Hakkai**: …O.o egotistical are we, Sanzo?

**Sanzo**::glares: talk and die

**Hakkai**::cowers:

**Dragid**::sweatdrop: yeah…anyway, Hakkai'll be here in chapter 10, so don't worry about him.

**Hakkai**: Hey!

:**BANG**:

**Hakkai**: XX

**Dragid**: Dammit, Sanzo::checks pulse:

**Sanzo**: Y'know, he isn't dead

**Dragid**: He's not dead! He just fainted!

**Sanzo**: I just said that, and besides, I shot into the ceiling.

**Dragid**: Oh…CRAP! People live up there, you moron!

**Sanzo**: So?

**Dragid's family**: SHAUNA!

**Dragid**: I didn't do it::runs away:


End file.
